Ten Million Dollars Comic Strips - Page 7
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424 Results for Ten Million Dollars
View 61 - 70 results for ten million dollars comic strips. Discover the best "Ten Million Dollars" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday July 11,
1999
Tags #budget estimate, #useful numbers, #boss hibernation, #say number, #budget
Transcript
Asok the Intern and Dilbert sit at a table. The Boss comes in and says, "I need your budget estimate today." Asok replies, "We won't have useful numbers until next week." Dilbert turns and says, "It doesn't work that way, Asok." Asok says, "No?" Asok and Dilbert approach the Boss who stares blankly into space. Dilbert explains, "As soon as he asked the question, he went into 'boss hibernation.'" Dilbert waves his hand in front of his face and says, "He can't see or hear anything until we say a number. Watch." Dilbert says, "Three million dollars." The Boss comes to and says, "Uhn!" The Boss walks away and says, "Three million. Good work." Dilbert says, "The first time I saw it, I panicked and ended up with a budget of $911."
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Wednesday May 17,
2006
Thursday July 13,
2006
Transcript
Dogbert the Lobbyist "For a million dollars I can have the government include your industrial waste in the recommended food pyramid." "For another million I'll have Congress authorize huge tax breaks for soulless, Blackberry-using weasels with coffee breath." "I just want to hug you!" "That's another million."
Saturday September 02,
2006
Thursday September 14,
2006
Transcript
Our sales guy vastly underbid a job. Now it's my project to install the system in a way that's profitable. "Blame your customer for underspecifying the features then charge her through the nose for change orders." "Three million dollars for an electrical plug?" "The base model uses a potato battery."
Monday December 25,
2006
Monday November 09,
2009
Tags #sitting, #complaining, #value, #recession, #ridiculous, #proud, #competing
Transcript
Topper Dilbert says, "The value of my home is down about 40%" Topper says, "That's nothing!" Topper says, "I paid a homeless Elbonian family a million dollars to take my house." Dilbert says, "A recession isn't a competition." Topper says, "Said the loser."
Wednesday August 22,
2007
Tags #stock holder meeting, #gadflies, #stock price dropped, #sleep at night
Transcript
Stockholder meeting CEO: Do we have any questions from Gadflies? You earned 72 million dollars while our stick price dropped nine percent. How can you sleep at night? CEO: ZZZZZ
Thursday March 10,
2016
Asok Negotiates With Boss
Tags #compensation, #haggle, #money, #negotiating, #negotiation, #obliviousness, #salary, #trick, #eric scott
Transcript
Asok: I demand a ten-million-dollar raise! Boss: Nice try! Every idiot knows that's your opening offer to set an anchor. Asok: I will settle for half of it. Boss: You'll take 30 percent of that, and not a penny more!
Tuesday March 15,
2016
Dogbert The Negotiating Expert
Tags #money, #negotiate, #negotiations, #racket, #guest artist, #josh shipley
Transcript
Boss: I hired an expert on negotiating to teach us a few things. He only costs a million dollars, and for that we get five minutes of his time. Let's get started. Dogbert: We're out of time, unless you want to renegotiate.