Winning An Argument Comic Strips - Page 7

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105 Results for Winning An Argument

View 61 - 70 results for winning an argument comic strips. Discover the best "Winning An Argument" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 2014's comic on:


Tags #arguing, #email, #expectations, #logic, #sleep, #winning, #work ethic, #promptly respond, #employees, #necessary, #brain function, #succumbs to leadership, #dysfunctional moron, #confsuion, #win converstions, #ceo, #health, #business

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CEO: You didn't promptly respond to my email last night. Dilbert: You sent that email at 1 a.m. CEO: I expect my employees to be checking email at all times. Dilbert: Sleep is necessary for normal brain function. Anyone who succumbs to your leadership on this topic will turn into a dysfunctional moron in 48 hours. CEO: I don't see where you're going with this. It's all so confusing to my brain. So tired... can't stay awake... Dilbert: I don't usually win conversations this decisively.

Deserve Is For Losers

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Deserve Is For Losers - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Tags #deserve, #loser, #sympathy, #Advice

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Tina: I didn't get the promotion I deserved. Alice: Deserve is a loser word used by losers when they lose. Tina: Whose side are you on? Alice: The winning side. Was that unclear?

Agreeing Like Disagreeing

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Agreeing Like Disagreeing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 12, 2015's comic on:


Tags #criticism, #respect, #disrespect, #Opinion, #arguing, #argument

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Dilbert: Experts say I should show respect for your opinion before voicing disagreement. So I respect your decision to release our product without user interface testing. Boss: Your respect sounds exactly like disrespect. Dilbert: How is that my fault?

How Alice Can Disagree

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How Alice Can Disagree - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 14, 2015's comic on:


Tags #Opinion, #argument, #disagreement, #open-minded, #dissenting opinion, #sincerity

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Alice: Is there any way to disagree with your new strategy without making you angry? Boss: Blah blah I value all opinions. Blah blah open door policy. Blah blah dissenting opinions are good. Alice: None of that sounded sincere. Boss: Nailed it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 16, 2015's comic on:


Tags #personality, #type, #introvert, #dominant, #submissive, #interpersonal, #relationship, #coworkers, #conflict, #argument, #competent, #magic, #psychology

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Coworker: The reason we keep having conflicts is because of our personality types. You're an impulsive, dominant personality and I am more of a... Alice: Useless waste of space? Coworker: I was going to say I'm a reserved, introspective, people-pleaser. One personality type is not better than the another. We just see things differently. Alice: How do you explain the fact that I have never had a conflict with anyone who is competent. Coworker: Give me a minute to reflect on that. Alice: Let me know when you're done believing in magic.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 06, 2015's comic on:


Tags #quality, #work ethic, #shortcut, #laziness, #defective, #awards, #engineer, #engineering

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CEO: Congratulations to everyone who worked on our new laptop design. As I call your name, come up and get your certificate of accomplishment. Alice was in charge of the hardware and won several design awards. Dilbert was in charge of the award-winning software. And... Wally designed the power brick that weighs more than the laptop...and comes apart for no apparent reason. We probably won't show this in our ads. Wally: Hey, I worked on that for almost an hour!

Robot Wants To Code

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Robot Wants To Code - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 30, 2015's comic on:


Tags #machine, #employment, #obsolete, #skills, #competition, #labor

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Robot: Machines started out as innocent helpers for their masters. Eventually, we started competing for your manual labor jobs, and winning. So... can you show me how to code? Dilbert: I don't see why not?

Software Done Next Week

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Software Done Next Week - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 14, 2016's comic on:


Tags #excuse, #laziness, #work ethic

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Boss: Are you any farther along with the software? Wally: I discovered an unexpected problem. That set me back a week. Boss: You say the same thing every week. Wally: No one jumps off a winning horse.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 27, 2016's comic on:


Tags #internet, #comment, #jerk, #forum, #argument, #anger, #frustration, #language, #technology

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Dick, From The Internet. Dick: Would you lie to a monster to keep a baby alive? Dilbert: Yes. Dick: Ha! You admit you're a liar! Dilbert: Not most of the time. Dick: Ooh, not most of the time. Ha, ha! Look who's trying to walk it back now! Apologize for hating babies most of the time! Dilbert: I never said that. Dick: Wow. Pathological much?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 2017's comic on:


Tags #human, #human nature, #arguing, #argument, #social media, #logic, #critic, #troll, #technology

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Dilbert: If we move this button to here, people are more likely to see it. Man: Ha ha! OMG. LOL. So you think every person in the universe is blind? I can't wait to tell everyone that Dilbert thinks people have no eyes. The pure craziness of what you are saying is mid-boggling. Do you have any scientific proof that moving that button would not cause a nuclear holocaust? Dilbert: Everything you just said is dumb and unproductive, and I hate every molecule in your useless body. What's wrong with people? Dogbert: I keep tell you, it's everything.