Sound Of No Money Comic Strips - Page 70
764 Results for Sound Of No Money
View 691 - 700 results for sound of no money comic strips. Discover the best "Sound Of No Money" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share September 07, 2016's comic on:
Boss: Our executive team didn't know what to do about weak sales. SO they reorganized the company and gave themselves new titles and big raises. They still don't know what to do about weak sales, but they report being happier about the situation.
Share September 29, 2016's comic on:
Wally: I don't have time to help. Coworker: What if I bribe you to do your job? I am literally offering to give you my personal money to do the job your employer pays you to do. Wally: Are you willing to turn a blind eye to my total lack of effort, or should I find a better briber?
Share September 30, 2016's comic on:
Wally: I started accepting bribes from co-workers to incent me to do my job. Dilbert: If it didn't work for your employer, why do they think it will work for them? Wally: Something about optimism. Dilbert: They didn't say why? Wally: All I know is that no one paid me to listen to them.
Share October 01, 2016's comic on:
Share October 03, 2016's comic on:
Share November 05, 2016's comic on:
Share November 21, 2016's comic on:
Dilbert: The flight to Elbonia is seventeen hours. Can I fly business class? Boss: No, because your pain will be temporary, but I won't get my bonus if I go over budget. Try being a team player for once. Dilbert: I didn't know Satan had a team.
Share January 04, 2017's comic on:
Boss: I'm giving you another software project to work on at the same time as your main project. Dilbert: That will ruin my flow. It will take too long to reset my brain when I switch between projects. Boss: Have you tried working longer hours without extra pay? Dilbert: Yes I have!
Share January 14, 2017's comic on:
Dilbert: The new hire gets paid more than me. It isn't fair. Dogbert: Fairness is a concept that was invented so kids and idiots could participate in debates. Dilbert: Hey, that's not fair. Dogbert: The best case scenario here is that you're younger than you look.
Share January 22, 2017's comic on:
Narrator: The bad analogy guy. Dilbert: And that's why I want to rewrite that part of the software. Man: That's like closing the barn door after the horse gets out. Dilbert: No, it isn't anything like that. I just think the current software could bet better. Man: So it's like throwing away the baby with the bathwater. Dilbert: No, it is not like that even a little! Man: You sound exactly like Hitler. That can't be a coincidence. Dilbert: Nothing you say makes sense! Man: That's like saying the earth is flat.