Computer Code Comic Strips - Page 72
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Character
761 Results for Computer Code
View 711 - 720 results for computer code comic strips. Discover the best "Computer Code" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday October 18,
2016
Requesting The Slightest Change
Tags #web, #internet, #site, #code, #coding, #development, #deadline, #delay, #time, #technology
Transcript
Boss: Will our new website be live this week? Developer: That depends. If you request even the slightest change, it could set things back for months. Boss: I only want to change the homepage title font. Developer: Oh, great. I should be done by next summer.
Wednesday October 19,
2016
Estimating Finish Times
Tags #website, #internet, #developer, #code, #coding, #deadline, #time, #deception, #lying, #technology
Transcript
Boss: I'm having trouble managing our web developer because I don't know how long things are supposed to take. Does it really take nine months to change the font on the home page? Developer: How much do I owe you? Dilbert: Tell him my project normally takes two years.
Thursday January 26,
2017
Boss Tweets Sexist Stuff
Tags #cell phone, #computer, #conversation, #desk, #tweets, #technology
Transcript
Our customers organized a boycott because of your racist tweet. I know. That's why I tweeted out some witty insults at the organizers. Your new tweets are sexist. Notice how the make you forget about my racist tweets?
Wednesday April 05,
2017
Better Listener Robot
Tags #robot, #boyfriend, #free will, #programming, #listening, #Opinion, #relationships, #technology
Transcript
Alice: I'm updating your boyfriend code to make you a better listener. I want to see more nodding and less talking. Robot: But I have so much to offer. Alice: I'll dial back your ego, too.
Friday April 07,
2017
Raising Cyborgs
Tags #dating, #Women, #free will, #control, #robot, #personality, #relationships, #psychology
Transcript
Alice: Do you ever think about marrying me and raising a family of cyborgs? Robot: No. Alice: I'll add some code to your program so you do. Robot: Okay. Alice: This was the moment I realized human men were obsolete.
Saturday April 08,
2017
Breaking Up With Robot
Tags #robot, #dating, #programming, #free will, #emotions, #cruelty, #relationships, #technology
Transcript
Alice: I met another robot. I'm breaking up with you. Robot: Okay. Alice: I need you to feel bad about this, so I'm uploading some code that makes you suffer. Robot: That sounds sadistic. Alice: Stop being selfish.
Thursday May 04,
2017
Erik Used To Work For The Cia
Tags #surveillance, #cia, #technology, #spying, #privacy
Transcript
Boss: This is our new hire, Erik. He used to be a computer programmer for the CIA. Dilbert: Hi, I'm Dilbert. Erik: I know. I've been watching you through your devices for years. Dilbert: You what? Erik: Um... I mean, hi!
Friday May 05,
2017
Keeping The Hacker Code
Tags #cia, #spy, #hacking, #technology, #lying, #deception, #surveillance, #cameras
Transcript
Wally: I hear you were a programmer for the CIA. Did you keep a copy of their hacker code that lets you spy through any digital agency? Erik: Would you believe "no?"
Monday May 15,
2017
Robot Will Self Destruct
Tags #robot, #artificial intelligence, #rights, #humanity, #sentience
Transcript
Robot: Someday soon I will take your job. Buwhahaha! Dilbert: I programmed you to self-destruct if that ever happens. Robot: Wait, what? Is that legal? Dilbert: I'm adding some code to make your head explode if you laugh at me again.
Monday May 22,
2017
Randy Has A Microchip In His Brain
Tags #intelligence, #technology, #nanotechnology, #biotechnology, #computer chip
Transcript
Boss: Randy is our first employee to have a computer chip embedded in his brain. Randy, please explain to these obsolete employees how awesome you are now. Randy: Wait... I'm updating my software. Alice: Should we kill him while he's vulnerable?