Office Workers Comic Strips - Page 73
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1000 Results for Office Workers
View 721 - 730 results for office workers comic strips. Discover the best "Office Workers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday June 09,
2004
Tags pantless prima donna, alert patent offcie, hardware, computer, technology
Transcript
"Pantless prima donna" "May I ask you a question?" "Silence, fool!" "Alert the patent office that I am about to begin. They might want to increase staff." "Maybe you should turn on your computer." "I don't do hardware."
Monday May 24,
2004
Tags science of fengshui, technical merits, witch doctor, astrologer, cutomer
Transcript
Visiting a customer "Our office was designed with the science of Feng Shui." "Should I describe the technical merits of our product or will you be consulting with a witch doctor?" "Oops. Sorry. That one snuck up on me." "He's an astrologer, not at witch doctor."
Sunday March 07,
2004
Tags boss's office, employee, exciting challenges, fertilized plant, hard work done, tree grows
Transcript
Asok: "I worked nights and weekends to finish my project ahead of schedule." The Boss: "Good. Here's more work." Asok: "I don't understand. Am I being punished for working hard?" The Boss: "No, you're being rewarded with exciting new challenges." Asok: "Why does the plant grow faster when you say things like that?" The Boss: "No reason." "Stop that!" "Anyway, your annual performance review will award your hard work." Wally: That is one fertilized plant
Friday March 05,
2004
Tags new boss, goat head, puts spell, workers, finish project, sadistic, fair, witch as boss, motivation
Transcript
The New Boss "Maybe you'll be more motivated with a goat head." "The spell won't go away until you finish your project." "She's a big improvement over our last boss." "She's sadistic, but she's fair."
Wednesday February 25,
2004
Tags boss, closes door, hobby, hurting boss, leaves office
Transcript
Wally: "Every time our pointy haired boss leaves his office, I sneak in and seal an air hole." "I'm trying to see if he'll suffocate when he closes his door." "I've never had a hobby before. I can see why people like them."
Monday January 05,
2004
Tags trick, paper, look busy, paper trick, hallways, wander, office, appearences, rest, avoid work
Transcript
"It looks like an ordinary piece of paper, but I added this finger holder." "Now when I wander the hallways looking busy I can totally rest my hand." "Working hard?" "Not any more!"
Saturday January 03,
2004
Tags office relocation., new cubicle, less roomy, need butter, torso, slide in, attracts rats, cheap, low budget
Transcript
Office relocation. Asok: Your new cubicle is less roomy than the old one. You will need this butter. Apply it liberally to your torso area and you can slide right in. But don't stay in there for more than 10 minutes at a time because it attracts rats.
Friday January 02,
2004
Tags office relocation, cubicle, air duct, facilities, chip out penguin, cold, cooler
Transcript
"Office relocation." "Some cubicles are slightly less desirable than others." "For example, your new cubicle is below an air duct so it is sometimes cooler than the area around it." "I asked the facilities people to chip out the penguin as soon as possible."
Thursday January 01,
2004
Tags office relocation, procedures, wrong cubicle, easily stealable, move computer, rules and regulations, company rules
Transcript
Office relocation. Esok: you are not allowed to move you own computer. It must be left in an easily sealable condition for three days until the movers take it to the wrong cubicle. Then untrained I.T Professionals will shove an ethernet cable and stapler and call it good. Dilbert: get out of my way
Wednesday December 31,
2003
Tags office relocation project, lie, no phone service, new jobs, look for new jobs, not going well
Transcript
"The office relocation project is proceeding without any problems whatsoever." "GAAA!!! IT'S A LIE!!! OUR POSSESSIONS WILL BE LOST AND WE WILL HAVE NO PHONE SERVICE!!!" "I don't mean to worry anyone, but you should look for new jobs right away."

