Managers Brain Comic Strips - Page 75

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

779 Results for Managers Brain

View 741 - 750 results for managers brain comic strips. Discover the best "Managers Brain" comics from Dilbert.com.

Boss Traveling Through Hot Spots

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Traveling Through Hot Spots - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #airlines, #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #booking, #flight, #airline, #coronavirus, #die, #Promotion, #greedy, #demise, #reward

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: it seems you are booking all of my connecting flights in coronavirus hot spots. you do realize that if i die, you don't get promoted to my job, right? carol: i'm not greedy. your demise would be reward enough.

Doing Nothing Is A Decision

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Doing Nothing Is A Decision - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #harsh, #hate, #lazy, #managers & supervisors, #progress, #projects, #sarcasm, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

boss with laptop and on video chat: wally, it seems that once again you have made no progress on any of your projects. wally: it looks that way from the outside but what you have to understand is that not doing something is also a decision. boss: i literally hate talking to you. wally: harsh.

Ted The First Gay And Disabled Person

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted The First Gay And Disabled Person - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #managers & supervisors, #business, #disabled, #token, #gay, #homosexual, #celebrate, #employment

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: ted, the company wants to celebrate you as the first disabled gay person to hold this job. ted: but... i'm neither gay nor disabled. boss: the celebration is next week, so you have plenty of time to fix that.

Alice Needs A Snack

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Alice Needs A Snack - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #decision, #managers & supervisors, #meeting, #break, #hungry, #snack

View Transcript

Transcript

alice: i'm too hungry to make good decisions. i need a break so i can eat a snack. boss: how do you know your decisions are bad? alice: i'm starting to agree with you. boss: i don't understand. alice is gone: exactly

Blaming The Last Manager

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Blaming The Last Manager  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #wrong, #fault, #manager, #inherited, #problem, #excellent, #leadership

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: everything that went wrong this year was the fault of the prior manager. i inherited his problems. dilbert: but everything that went right was because of your excellent leadership? boss: no jumping ahead.

Wally's Success

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Success - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #track, #success, #work, #correlation, #working, #sarcasm, #unproductive

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: i've been tracking my successes at work relative to my efforts, and i see no correlation. so if you see me not working hard, you should assume everything is fine. boss: you've never had a success to track. wally: i was hoping you didn't know that.

Boss Gets Vaccinated

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Gets Vaccinated - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #virus, #covid-19, #vaccine, #vaccination, #toxic, #soup, #deadly, #neener

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: i got the covid-19 vaccination, so i'm feeling safe. i feel sorry for you unvaccinated people who are marinating in a toxic soup of deadly viruses. dilbert: thank you for your concern. boss: neener-neener.

Gaming The System

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Gaming The System - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #decision, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #technology, #wrong, #believe, #system, #project

View Transcript

Transcript

boss: ted says you are making all the wrong technology decisions on your project. dilbert: why do you believe him? boss: because he's the last person i talked to. dilbert: but now you're talking to me. boss: stop trying to game the system.

Internal Audit

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Internal Audit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #audit, #accounting, #internal, #shoo, #great, #job

View Transcript

Transcript

auditor: i'll be performing an internal audit of your department. boss: there are no audit problems here because i won't let you look for them. shoo! auditor: that's good enough for me. can you tell my boss i did a great job?

Worth Praising

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Worth Praising - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #business, #human relations, #positive, #reinforcement, #praise worthy, #praise, #leader, #first

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: you never give me any positive reinforcement. boss: first you have to do something worth praising. wally: you can't call yourself a leader if you make me go first.