Business People Comic Strips - Page 76

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Business People

View 751 - 760 results for business people comic strips. Discover the best "Business People" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business ethics, debt, future generations, power to lazy, bathroom mirror

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I say we throw future generations under the bus and do as little work as possible until we die. Power to the lazy! That sounded more awesome when I practiced it in the bathroom mirror this morning.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags computers & peripherals, office equipment, email servers, inbox, vowels only, complain, loudest, complain to boss

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Ever since you moved our email servers to Transylbonia, my inbox has nothing but vowels. I.T. person: We I.T. people only respond to whoever complains loudest. You should complain to your bosss. Dilbert: I will! Boss' Computer: A ui aoe uie ou eai!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags low margin lines, high risk, start up, lumbering inefficiencies, buy in

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We're abandoning our low-margin lines of business and going into a whole new field. Dilbert: So... we'll be like a high-risk start-up company burdened with lumbering inefficiencies and a high cost structure? Boss: Was anything you said the same as buy-in?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags happiness, marriage, interpretation, annoying, soul mate, perceptive, psychology, relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Someday, I want to get married because studies show that married people are happier. Dilbert: A smarter interpretation is that no one wants to marry an unhappy person. Tina: You're annoying. Dilbert: With any luck, your soul mate won't be perceptive.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business ethics, environmental issues, fracking, competitors, headquarters, pollute water, generate earthquakes, fracking awesome

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: We're going to start fracking under our biggest competitors headquarters. My plan is to pollute their water and generate earthquakes to destroy their campus. The project code name is "fracking awesome." Dilbert: Catchy.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags brag, contributions, ego, hours of work, man of ideas, meeting, business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: My contributions can't be measured by the number of hours I work. I'm a man of ideas. One great idea is worth more than all of you put together. Boss: Fine. Let's hear your great idea. Wally: You just did.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags elbonian contract, legal, night work, contract programmmers, heart attacks

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Wally, I want you to manage our Elbonian contract programmers. You'll need to work at night because of the time difference. Wally: People who work at night have more heart attacks. Are you trying to kill me? Boss: Yes, and it's totally legal. Wally: Well played.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags viruses, piranha flu, sneezes, bad allergies

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: I've got a wicked case of piranha flu. Ted: I've never heard of... Carol: Ahchooo!!! I should probably tell people I just have bad allergies.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags page layout, ugly, ugly cubicle, aesthetics, barber, parents, trample

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Your page layout is ugly. Tina: Whose fault is that? I work in an ugly cubicle surrounded by ugly people. You trample on my sense of aesthetics and expect me to be unaffected? Dilbert: So... it's my fault? Tina: You, your parents, your barber, and whoever dresses you.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business ethics, agreements, deals, existence, empire, seem larger, paycheck, fair plan, awful world, balckmail, boss, employee

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: IF you agree to give me no work, I will agree to not sue you with some sort of bogus employee claim. My existence will make your empire seem larger, and stockholders will get stuck with the bill for my paycheck. Boss: Why does that seem like a fair plan? Wally: We live in an awful world.