Work Ethic Comic Strips - Page 77
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1000 Results for Work Ethic
View 761 - 770 results for work ethic comic strips. Discover the best "Work Ethic" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday July 01,
2011
Tags anger, marriage, fist of work, feel the wrath, totally legal, eye canons, single, higher setting, politically incorrect, relationships
Transcript
Alice: I have been informed that it is politically incorrect to use my fist of death at work. So fell the wrath of my totally legal eye cannons! Noise: Budddabudda!! Asok: Gaa!! Alice: Oops. I didn't know you were single. Married guys can take a higher setting.
Thursday June 23,
2011
Tags crimes, internet & world wide web, black hat, websites ranking, search engine, unethical, near certainty, loserish, talking
Transcript
Boss: I want you to use "black hat" methods to raise our website's ranking on search engines. Dilbert: What do you like best about that idea - the fact that it's unethical or the near certainty of getting caught? Boss: That's sort of a loserish thing to say. Dilbert: Talking doesn't work for people like me.
Sunday June 19,
2011
Tags embarrassment, walkways, minute, meeting, walk and talk, barely concentrate, prove underling wrong, business
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you have a minute? Boss: I'm on my way to a meeting. Follow me. We'll walk and talk. Dilbert: I don't see how this can possibly work. You can barely concentrate when you're sitting perfectly still. When you add the extra complexity of walking, it's like asking a squirrel to land a 747. Boss: Must... prove underling... wrong... Noise: BONK! Dilbert: I didn't know that being right could feel so good.
Saturday June 18,
2011
Tags anxiety, work ethic, worry, indispensible, fired, useless, riskier, toe clip, 20 years of service
Transcript
Asok: Wally, should I try to become indispensable so I won't be fired? Wally: No. Indispensable people end up working too hard because they can't risk showing anyone else how to do what they do. Asok: Being useless seems riskier. Wally: Have you seen the tie clip I got for 20 years of service?
Tuesday June 14,
2011
Tags cruelty, frustration, idea, never work, reject hypothesis, self doubt
Transcript
Man: Your idea will never work. Dilbert: At what point did you reject the hypothesis that you're too dumb to understand how good the idea is? I'm becoming even less of a people person.
Monday May 30,
2011
Tags quarreling, suspicion, work ethic, work independantly, boss, preemptive strike, project update
Transcript
Wally: I can't work for a boss who doesn't trust me to work independently! Boss: Is this a preemptive strike so I won't ask why you didn't turn in a project update? Wally: And more distrust. How do you live with yourself?
Thursday May 26,
2011
Tags blaming, quarreling, work independantly, close eyes, fall back, better than other people
Transcript
Dogbert: Today you'll learn how to work independently. In this exercise, I want you to put your arms at you side, close your eyes, and fall backward. Noise: Thud thud thud. Dogbert: And it's still better than working with other people.
Saturday May 21,
2011
Tags consensus, lost and confused, lateness, doesn't work
Transcript
Dilbert: There was a consensus in that room that you're not important, so we started without you. we hate you for disrespecting us with your lateness and we expect you'll be lost and confused by th rest of this meeting. Alice: in summary, lateness is one of those things that doesn't work for everyone.
Sunday May 01,
2011
Tags boats, business ethics, new boat, engineers, skills, boss's boat, picture, nautical interests
Transcript
Boss: Who wants to see a picture of my new boat? Dilbert: That's a very good question. If we consider the fact that we work much harder than he does... Carol: And we have valuable engineering skills, whereas he can't operate the GPS in his SUV... and for some reason we don't get paid enough to buy impressive boats. Dilbert: And we have no nautical interests whatsoever. I think your best bet is people who don't know you. Man: And you are? Boss: This only works if we don't get too familiar.
Saturday April 23,
2011
Tags announcements, committee decided, file naming, month, year, day, space, temperature, airport, hat size, long meeting, best work
Transcript
Ted: The committee decided that the file naming convention will start with the date, in the order of month, year, day... then a space, then the temperature at the airport, and the hat size of the nearest squirrel. To be perfectly honest, it was a long meeting and we probably didn't do our best work toward the end.


