Big Business Comic Strips - Page 78
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1000 Results for Big Business
View 771 - 780 results for big business comic strips. Discover the best "Big Business" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday December 20,
2003
Tags human resources, evil director, severance package, spittle, laugh, purr, bad package, business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil director of Human Resources. "What kind of severance package do I get?" "I can't decide if I should laugh or purr, but there's definitely spittle in your future." "This is a bad package." "PURRRR-HA-HA HA-PURRRRR-HA HA-PURRRR!!!"
Wednesday February 04,
2004
Tags new chip, slower, claim fastest, benchmark test, used old drivers, wearing a wire, marketing, crime, business
Transcript
Dilbert: "Our new chip is slower than our competition's products." The Boss: "We'll claim we're the fastest. If anyone does benchmark tests, we'll say they used old drivers." Dilbert: "Whenever I talk to you, I feel like I should be wearing a wire." The boss: "Since when is marketing a crime?"
Thursday February 26,
2004
Tags dance with death, secreatry, desk, work to early grave, first to drop, good morning, first thing, competition, resentment, anger
Transcript
Carol: "Well, look who came back to dance with death." "Once again you will try to work me to an early grave and I will book you on dangerous business trips." "Who will be the first to drop? Who?" The boss: "What ever happened to 'good morning'?"
Friday March 05,
2004
Tags new boss, goat head, puts spell, workers, finish project, sadistic, fair, witch as boss, motivation
Transcript
The New Boss "Maybe you'll be more motivated with a goat head." "The spell won't go away until you finish your project." "She's a big improvement over our last boss." "She's sadistic, but she's fair."
Friday March 26,
2004
Tags rat, meeting, walls spot, seat filler, proedcest day, career work out, look at me now, fired, business
Transcript
Ratbert: Wally is in the men's room. I've accepted a position as his seat filler. This is the proudest day of my life. I never ingrained that my career would work out so well, I want to scream to the world " look at name now" allyL false alarm. you're fired.
Saturday March 27,
2004
Tags evil director, human resources, been excessed, yoga move, rageful comments, hope for a hug, business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil director of human resources "Your position has been excessed, or as I prefer to say..." "I will tear the flesh from your bones!" "Phew! I love that yoga move." "There is like, no hope for a hug, right?"
Saturday May 01,
2004
Tags invoices, unauthorized dedcutions, standard industry practice, dance like chickens, chicken are funny
Transcript
Dogbert: "You can rob your small suppliers by making unauthorized deductions from their invoices." "When they complain, say it's a standard industry practice and threaten to take your business elsewhere." "The make them dance like chickens." The boss: "Ha! Ha! Chickens are funny."
Monday May 03,
2004
Tags 80 hour week, crazy talk, less work, loofah, evil director, human resources, business
Transcript
Catbert: Evil Director of Human Resources Alice: Im working 80 hours a week. I barely have time to bathe. Catbert: try using your tongue during meetings, Its like a bath and a loofah all in one. Alice: Or I could do less work. Catbert: Thats crazy talk.
Tuesday May 18,
2004
Tags carol, secreatry, secret society, executive secreataries, rule the world, own secreatries, Women, meeting, take over the world, evil overlords, business
Transcript
Carol: welcome to the secret society of executive secretaries. Today we will wrest power from our evil overlords! Tomorrow we'll rule the world! Then connie pointed out that we'd need our own secretaries and the whole thing fell apart.
Wednesday May 26,
2004
Tags kodos, morale, mascot, meetings, moral improves, bear suit, meeting, low morale, idea for imprvement, business
Transcript
The Boss: "His name is Kudos, the bear-er of good morale!" "Kudos" "He's our new mascot. He'll attend all of our meetings until morale improves." "Today is Asok's turn in the suit."

