Office Workers Comic Strips - Page 78
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1000 Results for Office Workers
View 771 - 780 results for office workers comic strips. Discover the best "Office Workers" comics from Dilbert.com.
Sunday January 20,
2019
Tags annoyance, insults, office, office workers, people, sarcasm, introvert, coworkers
Transcript
Tina: Sometimes it seems as if you don't like me. Dilbert: Don't be ridiculous. I'm just an introvert. Being around people drains my energy. I only avoid you because spending five minutes with you feels like being buried alive. With fleas instead of dirt. Tina: So...it isn't personal? Dilbert: I need a nap.
Monday January 21,
2019
Very Smart Phd
Tags education, intelligence, office workers, sarcasm
Transcript
Man: Hi. I'm very smart, but I don't know how to do anything. Dilbert: Where did you get your PH.D.? Man: I didn't say I have a PH.D. Dilbert: You kinda did.
Wednesday January 23,
2019
No Recognisiton
Tags addiction, office workers, social media, video games, expectations
Transcript
Man: Video games and social media have made me addicted to artificial success. But here in the real world, I do not receive the recognition I so crave. Dilbert: That's because all you do is play video games and use social media. Man: See? I'm getting nothing.
Monday January 28,
2019
Documents On Chairs
Tags frustrated, office, office workers, paper
Transcript
Dilbert: Gaaa!!! I hate it when people leave documents on my chair! I will have my revenge by sticking this at the bottom of my biggest pile. Winning.
Tuesday January 29,
2019
New Forms
Tags business, money, office, office workers, efficiency
Transcript
Dilbert: Did you approve my budget request? Boss: No, you used the old form. Dilbert: Do we have new forms? Boss: In hindsight, we should have funded the creation of new budget request forms before we made the old ones obsolete.
Wednesday January 30,
2019
Best Product
Tags criticism, jokes, meetings, office, office workers, sarcasm, presentation
Transcript
Ted: As you can see from this chart, our product has been rated number one for six years in a row. Dilbert: Why does your chart stop four years ago? Ted: I'll bet you don't get invited to a lot of parties. Dilbert: That's just a lucky guess.
Thursday January 31,
2019
Tweaking Variables
Tags business, managers & supervisors, office, office workers, strategy, stupidity
Transcript
Dilbert: I can't get my five-year projections to match what you told the board. Boss: Try tweaking the variables until they do. Dilbert: That would make me a liar. Boss: Nah. In five years it will look like ordinary stupidity.
Friday February 01,
2019
Ten Year Financial Projections
Saturday February 02,
2019
Take The Stairs
Tags birthdays, encouragement, exercise & fitness, health, office, office workers, company, life insurance
Transcript
Boss: The company encourages you to take the stairs instead of the elevator because it is good for your health. Ted: I take the elevator because my life insurance doesn't pay off if I kill myself all at once. Boss: On another topic, we will celebrate birthdays this month with cake in the break room. Ted: Perfect.
Monday February 04,
2019
Robot Has A Cyborg
Tags insults, Kids, office workers, robot, technology, smartphone
Transcript
Alice: Today I saw a kid on a hoverboard using a smartphone with headphones. It was like a creepy new species that is half-human and half-robot. Robot: That's my son. He's a cyborg. Alice: I'll report myself to human resources.

