Office Comic Strips - Page 78

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794 Results for Office

View 771 - 780 results for office comic strips. Discover the best "Office" comics from Dilbert.com.

Encouraging Smoking

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Encouraging Smoking - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 25, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #meeting, #office, #office workers, #smoking, #turnover, #breaks

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dibert, the boss and ask at conference table. the boss: our plan for reducing turnover is to encourage smoking. the boss: that way, everyone gets a relaxing smoke break several times per day. dilbert: or non-smokers could take breaks. the boss: now i wish you had been in the meeting when we planned this.

Jargon Poisoning

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Jargon Poisoning - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 26, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #huddle, #jargon, #calendar

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ted: let's plan a huddle to ideate around that opportunity. dilbert visually distressed and yelling: gaaa!!! i have jargon poisoning! ted: i'll send you a calendar invite. dilbert has fell over and feet are in air.

Zombie Projects

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Zombie Projects - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 28, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #zombie, #sloth, #fail, #salary

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the boss: wally, i'm putting you in charge of all the zombie projects that refuse to die. the boss: i'm counting on your sloth and incompetence to finish them off, so management feels comfortable finally canceling them. the boss: as of today, i'm paying you to fail. wally: actually, this is just the first time you're aware of it.

When Wally Is Busy

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When Wally Is Busy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 01, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #busy, #witnesses

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tina: are you busy? wally: yes. tina: when should i check back? wally: when i'm not busy. tina: when are you not busy? wally: whenever there are no witnesses.

Why Not A Center Of Excellence

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Why Not A Center Of Excellence - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 02, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #excellence

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ceo: maybe we should creat a "center of excellence." the boss: what exactly does that mean? ceo: i think it means whatever we want it to mean. the boss: then what good is it? ceo: let's not get lost in the weeds.

Measuring Excellence

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Measuring Excellence - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 03, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #excellence

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dilbert, the boss and wally at conference room table. the boss: we opened our first "center of excellence" today. the boss: at the risk of sounding too optimistic, we should be brimming with excellence by nightfall. dilbert: how will we know if is working? the boss: it's better if we don't try too hard to measure it.

Centers Of Excellence

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Centers Of Excellence - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 04, 2019's comic on:


Tags #lie, #managers & supervisors, #office, #excellence

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the boss: make a slide deck that says our "centers of excellence" are creating more excellence. dilbert: do we have any data to support that claim? the boss: no. dilbert: you want me to lie? the boss: is that suddenly too much to ask.

Leaders Have Differen Memories

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Leaders Have Differen Memories - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 05, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #meeting, #office, #stupid, #leadership

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the boss: we had a leadership meeting to decide how to move forward. the boss: but all the leaders left the meeting with wildly different ideas about what we agreed on. carol: how do you leaders plan to solve that? the boss: phase one involves accusing each other of being stupid.

Wally Uses Speakerphonetif

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Wally Uses Speakerphonetif - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 06, 2019's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #office, #office workers, #speaker phone, #voice-texting, #click

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the boss: i asked you to stop using your speaker-phone because it was disturbing your co-workers. the boss: now they tell me you started doing voice-texting, which is even worse. wally: okay fine. later that day. alice visually upset and yelling: turn off your keyboard click sound! wally's cell phone: click click click.

Boss Needs Copies

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Boss Needs Copies - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 08, 2019's comic on:


Tags #boss, #frustrated, #irritation, #office, #office workers

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Boss: I need three copies of this. Carol: You just literally walked past the copier. Boss: Sheesh! Forget it! Just shred the stupid document. Carol: The shredder is right behind you.