Conference Call Comic Strips - Page 79

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840 Results for Conference Call

View 781 - 790 results for conference call comic strips. Discover the best "Conference Call" comics from Dilbert.com.

Asok Not A Terrorist

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Asok Not A Terrorist - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 30, 2016's comic on:


Tags #terrorist, #terrorism, #extremism, #frustration, #racism, #accusation, #accuse

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Boss: Did you threaten to kill Dick? Asok: He accused me of being a terrorist! Boss: Are you? Asok: Gaaa! I just want to blow up this whole building! Boss: Um... I need to make a call. Asok: It better not be about me!

Boss Can't Decide Who To Vote For

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Boss Can't Decide Who To Vote For - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 02, 2016's comic on:


Tags #election, #voting, #choice, #choosing, #decision, #indecision, #judgement

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Boss: I can't decide who to vote for in this election. Alice: Make your voting decision the same way you make your work decisions. Boss: Common sense and gut instinct? Alice: We just call it "wrong."

Wally Builds An Mvp Version

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Wally Builds An Mvp Version - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 21, 2016's comic on:


Tags #ai, #technology, #fake, #deception

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Wally: I built a minimum viable product, or MVP, as I like to call it. Boss: That's a block of wood. Wally: I call it "Artificial Intelligence." Ask it any question. Boss: What is my middle name? Wally: It's being shy, just like people. Boss: It has emotions,too?

Mom Drone

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Mom Drone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 04, 2016's comic on:


Tags #drone, #surveillance, #mom, #mothers, #spying

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Asok: Hey, you have one of those cool selfie drones! Dilbert: No, I keep forgetting to call my mom, so she sent a drone to watch me. Asok: Is that legal? Dilbert: I checked. It's not trespassing unless it lands.

Dogbert Discovers Dogbertium

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Dogbert Discovers Dogbertium - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 25, 2016's comic on:


Tags #science, #discovery, #trick, #deception

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Dogbert: My particle accelerator has discovered a new fundamental particle that I call "Dogbertium." It's properties are awesomeness and mystery. One of the mysteries is that it only exists when people don't ask too many questions.

Boss Wants Alice To Be His Work Wife

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Boss Wants Alice To Be His Work Wife - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 13, 2016's comic on:


Tags #wife, #spouse, #work, #creep, #relationships, #repulsive

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Boss: I decided to call you my work-wife. Alice: Gurk. I"m creeped out! I'm creeped out! I'm creeped out! Boss: Just like at home. Alice: I need a shower.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 2016's comic on:


Tags #health, #morning, #waking up, #sleepless, #complaining, #manager, #sociopath, #emotions

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Boss: Can you take a call with our Elbonian customers at 6 a.m. tomorrow? Dilbert: Sure. All I need to do is put my health at risk by not getting enough sleep tonight. Of course, I'll hate your guts for making me come to work so early. And I would expect my bad attitude to infect my co-workers and make them less productive, too. My lack of sleep will affect my decision-making, obviously. And I"m working on important projects, so the ripple effect could be catastrophic. So, do you still want me to be here at 6 a.m. tomorrow? Boss: Yes. You don't have to be a sociopath to be a manager, but it helps.

Looks Good But Won't Work

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Looks Good But Won't Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 14, 2017's comic on:


Tags #ideas, #impracticality, #managers, #leadership, #threat

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Boss: The one they call Dilbert suggested we do something that looks good but won't work. CEO: Is this the first trace of management potential you've seen from him? Boss: You think it's a fluke? CEO: Let's keep an eye on it.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 19, 2017's comic on:


Tags #space, #cubicle, #conference room, #office, #sharing, #obstinacy

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Dilbert: I have this conference room booked for a meeting. Alice: This is my private office now. I took it over. Dilbert: You can't just take over a conference room. Alice: I already did. It was easy. Now all I need to do is act as if it would be totally unreasonable to ask me to leave. Dilbert: You need to leave. I have this room reserved. Alice: That's totally unreasonable! I'm all settled in and I'm working on a company-critical deadline! Dilbert: I guess I could cancel my meeting. Alice: Perfect. Now get out of my office.

Tina Wants To Borrow Wally's Phone

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Tina Wants To Borrow Wally's Phone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 01, 2017's comic on:


Tags #cell phone, #germs, #cleanliness, #bathroom, #technology

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Tina: My phone is broken. Can I use yours to make a call? Wally: Absolutely. If it seems warm, that's because I was using it in the men's room for the past two hours. Tina: I'll ask someone else. Wally: Yup.