Productivity Today Comic Strips - Page 8
437 Results for Productivity Today
View 71 - 80 results for productivity today comic strips. Discover the best "Productivity Today" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share February 22, 1994's comic on:
Wally: "Here's your 'buzzword bingo' card for the meeting." Wally: "If the boss uses a buzzword on your card, you check it off. The objective is to fill a row." The Boss: "You're all very attentive today. My proactive leadership must be working!" Wally: "Bingo, sir."
Share March 20, 1994's comic on:
wally: Im looking forward to retirement. I can't wait! I'll have my tiny fixed income, barley enough to survive! ...and a new health problem almost everyday! Wally: I'll have wrinkles everywhere and I'll actually shrink! HAHA! I'll produce nothing and I'll complain constantly! Dilbert: You're looking forward to a ll that?? WallyL well...compared to working here... The boss: Its time for the pre meeting meeting on employee productivity. Wally and Dilbert: mmm. fixed income ...health problems...
Share May 01, 1994's comic on:
Dilbert: Thank you all for coming to our engineering quality team meeting. Dilbert: Today we'll try to identify the root cause of our slow design process. Wally: Let me take some wild guesses here. Management keeps increasing our work and cutting our staff. Wally: we spend all out time giving status reports to unnecessary layers of management!! Wally: ow we're having all -day meetings to talk about our efficiency!! Dilbert: I was kinda hoping for some thing that inst anybody fault. Our computers are too slow. we need new ones, Dilbert: now we're getting someplace.
Share May 12, 1994's comic on:
"Ratbert the consultant" "It looks like you've all done your assignments for me." "Your input is so important that I'll have it put in a big binder in stored in the same building that your president works!" "And I'll put in a good word for you when I meet with your boss later today." "Wink, thumbs up" "How about two good words?"
Share June 09, 1994's comic on:
"If I start the project today and work nights and weekends it will take...oh, six months." "It has to be done in ONE month so we can show it to our VP on her annual visit." "I have to know; does it even cross your mind to handle this differently?" "I'll need daily status reports on why you're so behind."
Share August 07, 1994's comic on:
The Boss: "Laurie's our new engineer. Show her the ropes, Dilbert." "I meant figuratively." Dilbert: "This is your anti-productivity pod." "It's equipped with a little device that rings anytime you try to concentrate." "The top is open so none of the background noise is inadvertently muffled." "And you're on the main aisle, so you'll be haunted every minute by footsteps behind you. Step...step...step." The Boss: "We need to talk."
Share August 12, 1994's comic on:
"Wally, you're invited to a 'Still Single' shower in my honor." "I'm trying to recoup all the money I've blown on wedding gifts and baby showers." "Someone's feeling a little bitter today." "I have a pattern registered at 'Electron Hut'."
Share September 07, 1994's comic on:
The Boss: We'll be getting a new "Bungee Boss" sometime today. Hi - Im -your- new- boss- lets- change- every- thing- beef- I- get- reassigned- pops- too- late- goodbye. sproing wally: He was like a mentor to me. Dilbert: I think he made a difference. The Boss: Incoming!
Share September 11, 1994's comic on:
"Copy Room" "Stop right there!" "It's Phil, the Prince of Insufficient Light." "What's in your hands?" "I'm just borrowing some paper for the laser printer. There's no law against that!" "I think we both know that the copier paper and the printer paper are purchased and tracked separately." "You've made a mockery of the system! I darn you to heck!" "Your punishment is to sit at the secretary's cubicle and endure the stale wit of your co-workers." "Hey, Wendy, there's something different about you today!"