Six Yams Comic Strips - Page 8

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

141 Results for Six Yams

View 71 - 80 results for six yams comic strips. Discover the best "Six Yams" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 07, 2001's comic on:


Tags #service anniversary, #20 years, #one year pins, #asked for money, #six years, #pay for pins, #card with wrong name, #unappreciative, #creepy business practices

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice is sitting at her computer. The Boss approaches from behind with a package in his hand and says, "Happy service anniversary, Alice." The Boss continues, "We're out of twenty-year pins so I got twenty of the one- year pins." The Boss hands Alice the package and says, "You can pin these babies all over your blouse... or fishing hat if you prefer." The Boss continues, "The card says, 'To Kathy' but it was never opened. For some reason she quit the day she got her twenty pins." The Boss continues, "Incidentally, I have to charge you $262 for the pins. The company doesn't pay for them." Alice holds the box angrily. Alice responds, "First of all, I've only worked here for about six years.." The Boss interrupts, "Wow, you look older. Anyway, just give me the $262 and throw away eight pins and we'll call it good." Alice rolls up her sleeve and shakes with anger. She holds one arm back with the other. The Boss asks, "Why are you rolling up your sleeve? Are you going to pin them to your arm?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 08, 2001's comic on:


Tags #ceo, #smashed pay, #share the pain, #six million to four, #sandwich bag underwear, #intern is poor

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Asok and Dilbert, "Our CEO has voluntarily slashed his pay from six million per year to four." The Boss continues, "In a written statement he said he wants to 'share the pain.' The Boss asks, "Do you feel better now?" Asok replies, "I make my own underwear from sandwich bags."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 28, 2001's comic on:


Tags #35th of month, #earned dogbert miles, #live in terminal, #permafrost, #primitive society, #south pole, #dogbert airlines

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Dogbert Airlines. Dogbert announces into a microphone, "Attention travelers! Our hub at the South Pole is experiencing permafrost." The customers look alarmed as they listen to the loud speaker. Dogbert's voice continues, "Please form a primitive society and live in the terminal forever." Dogbert continues into the microphone, "The good news is that you'll earn six 'Dogbert Miles' that can be used on the 35th of every month."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 27, 2002's comic on:


Tags #email, #engineer, #huge, #huge buzz, #huge success, #sales increase, #six emails, #track numbers, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

A coworker addresses the meeting, "The ad campaign was a huge, huge success!" The Boss responds, "Wow!" Dilbert responds, "Define 'huge, huge' success.' How much did sales increase?" The coworker replies, "We don't track those numbers." The coworker continues, "But I know the ad created a huge buzz because of all the e-mail I got the next day." Dilbert asks the coworker, "How many messages did you get?" The coworker responds, "Six. But that's a lot for one topic." The Boss exclaims, "Wow! Six!" Dilbert responds, "How many of the six were from your own employees?" The coworker turns to The Boss and asks, "Who invited the engineer?" The Boss replies, "I thought he was with you."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 20, 2002's comic on:


Tags #need to know, #basis, #crawl space, #underhouse, #news, #don't believe news, #fake news

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is sitting on his couch. Dogbert approaches and says, "I'm putting you on a strict 'need to know' basis." Dogbert continues, "And stay out of the crawl space under the house." Dogbert continues, "And don't believe anything you see in the news for about six months."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 09, 2002's comic on:


Tags #acquired benefits, #adopt program, #blend benefits progarm, #blending, #evil director, #maternity leave, #merger approved, #smokers

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss addresses a meeting, "The merger has been approved." The Boss continues, "Our evil director of human resources will blend the acquired company's benefits with our own." Alice, Dilbert, and Wally cry, "WAAA! WAAA! WAAA!" The Boss thinks, "Apparently they know what blending means." Catbert says to the other HR director, "Let's see... My company offers six months of maternity leave for mothers." The other HR director replies, "We treat 'em like smokers. They have to squat in the parking lot for 10 minutes then go back to work." Catbert says, "That's very evil.. We'll adopt your program." The other HR director responds, "Thanks." The Boss reads the new benefits plan. He asks, "What is 'draining?' Catbert responds, "Our company called it training."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 27, 2002's comic on:


Tags #book, #choose good attitude, #six months to live, #depressed, #bad advice, #apathetic

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss stops a sad employee and says, "Hey, guy, cheer up. You can choose to have a good attitude!" The sad employee replies, "I just found out I have six months to live." The Boss smiles and hands the employee a book. The Boss says, "Maybe I'm saying it wrong. Try reading the book yourself."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 19, 2002's comic on:


Tags #impossible assignment, #right place, #reword, #objectives, #match, #analyzed, #feasibility, #project, #discontinue

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is home in his bathrobe. He says to Dogbert, "Can you help me weasel out of an impossible assignment?" Dogbert replies, "You came to the right place." Dogbert continues, "Gradually reword the objectives of the project until one day they match what you've already done." Headline: Six Months Later. Dilbert says to The Boss, "I successfully analyzed the feasibility of discontinuing the project." The Boss responds, "Success!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 16, 2002's comic on:


Tags #health, #life expectency, #current workload, #two peoples jobs, #six months, #five months, #shop, #Card

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is sitting at his computer. He points to the screen and says to Dogbert, "I calculated the impact of work on my health and life expectancy." Dilbert continues, "At my current workload, doing two people's jobs, I have... six months to live." Dogbert responds, "Remind me in five and a half months so I can shop for a card."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 2002's comic on:


Tags #work to death, #six months, #mentally incompetent, #remove name, #beneficiaries

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Estate Planning. Dilbert is in a lawyer's office. He says to the lawyer, "I expect to work myself to death in six months, so I need a will." The lawyer asks, "Are you mentally incompetent?" Dilbert responds, "I don't think so." The lawyer says, "Okay then, I'll remove my name from the list of beneficiaries."