Red Faced Monkey Comic Strips - Page 8

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

127 Results for Red Faced Monkey

View 71 - 80 results for red faced monkey comic strips. Discover the best "Red Faced Monkey" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dogbert The Meeting Referee

Thank you for voting.
Dogbert The Meeting Referee - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 18, 2018's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #story, #time-wasting, #red card, #Wally, #refree

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert, the meeting referee. The Boss: That reminds me of a story. Dogbert: Tweet! Fifteen-yard penalty for a time-wasting story! The Boss: I''ll make it quick. Dogbert: Red card!

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 11, 2011's comic on:


Tags #angry rich guy, #buy small companies, #mergers & acquisitions, #obscenely profitable, #prosperity, #suck good will, #universally despised

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Our company is obscenely profitable but universally despised. Our plan is to buy a smaller and more popular company, take their name, and suck out their goodwill like a monkey on an orange. Please welcome their founder, Bradley. He's the angriest rich guy you'll ever meet.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 06, 2012's comic on:


Tags #copyright & trademark, #earmuffs for oysters, #insane, #lawsuit monkey, #lawyer, #legal

View Transcript

Transcript

Salesman: Do you mind if I pretend to be helpful while I awkwardly try to upsell you? Dilbert: Nope. Do you mind if I pretend to be listening while I think about other things? Salesman: Cool. Dilbert: I'm glad I don't have your job. Salesman: How old is your refrigerator? Do you like ice?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 2012's comic on:


Tags #service animal, #monkey, #coffee cup, #dignified, #coffee warm, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

Carl: Thought being a service animal would be a noble calling. But I worry that our relationship has drifted into something less dignified. wally: Thats what keeps my coffee warm. CarL: I am so angry right now.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 15, 1989's comic on:


Tags #poetry, #poem, #monkey, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the table. Dilbert asks, "Well? What do you think of my new poem?" Dogbert replies, "I once read that given infinite time, a thousand monkeys with typewriters would eventually write the entire works of Shakespeare." Dilbert asks, "But what about MY poem?" Dogbert replies, "Three monkeys, ten minutes."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 05, 1989's comic on:


Tags #cross word, #challenge

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert sit at a table playing Scrabble. As Dogbert arranges his letters on the game board, Dilbert asks, "What the heck is 'jequirity?'" Dogbert replies, "You know - the poisonous, red and black seed of the Indian Licorice plant. Want to challenge?" Dilbert replies, "No. At least this one has vowels." Dogbert says, "That's 704 for me."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 11, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #nasa, #shuttle, #specific, #duties, #video, #risky, #experiment, #ideas

View Transcript

Transcript

Nasa Scientist 1: You will be with one other... Uh... Astronaut in a private room. You two will have no specific duties on this mission. I'll be monitoring you on video. Nasa Scientist 2: A nerd, a monkey, and one Nintendo at zero gravity... Pretty risky experiment. Nasa Scientist 1: To be honest, we were running low on good ideas.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 16, 1990's comic on:


Tags #dilbert's, #ego, #porsche, #woman, #Dilbert, #dating, #bar

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Nice toupee. Dilbert's Ego: Thanks. It's the, "Roy Orbison," model. I am now ready to hit the dating scene. Woman at Bar: Really? You drive a porsche? Dilbert's Ego: It's red... But enough about me.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 03, 1991's comic on:


Tags #language, #Dilbert, #Wally, #zimbu, #zoo, #engineer, #cafeteria, #donuts, #skills, #staff, #meeting, #monkey

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert stands in front of Zimbu the Monkey's desk and says, "Look, Zimbu, you might have learned language skills at the zoo, but it takes more than that to be an engineer." Wally enters and says, "Dilbert, Zimbu, let's hit the cafeteria for morning donuts." Dilbert, Wally and Zimbu sit at a table eating donuts. Dilbert says, "Okay, after ten a.m. it takes more than language skills to be an engineer." Wally says, "Not today -- we have a staff meeting."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 04, 1991's comic on:


Tags #behavior, #language, #Dilbert, #zimbu, #charade, #skills, #rote, #logic, #reasoning, #program, #writting, #basic, #work

View Transcript

Transcript

Zimbu the Monkey sits at his desk working on the computer. Dilbert says, "It's time to end this charade, Zimbu!" Dilbert continues, "Your language skills are simple rote behavior. Monkeys are incapable of logic and reasoning." Dilbert looks at the computer screen and says, "Ha! And that program you're writing -- it's probably in 'Basic.'" Zimbu asks, "Do you ever work?"