Search Results for "same questions"
Share April 27, 2005's comic on:
The Boss: "Asok, I decided to give you a slight promotion!" Asok: "Gasp! A slight promotion!" The Boss: "The pay will be the same but you can make your cubicle slighlty larger by shaving the ragged fabric on the inside walls." "Your new title is spelled just like the old one but it's pronounced totally differently." "ZZZZZ"
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Share October 06, 2005's comic on:
I hired Mr. Dogbert to write the F.A.Q. for our web site. "The key is to anticipate our customers' most likely questions." "Question 1: Where does your CEO live? I need to know so I can throw your cruddy project through his biggest window."
Share March 02, 2006's comic on:
"I've been asked to design and build our center of excellence." "Which, as I understand it, is like a presidential library honoring my life's work." "In time, people learn to stop asking me questions."
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Share February 08, 2013's comic on:
Boss: This isn't what I wanted. Dilbert: I know. But given your unclear email and your unwillingness to answer follow-up questions, I decided to do whatever entertained me. Boss: Do we have a problem here? Dilbert: No, this totally works for me.
Share April 20, 2013's comic on:
Wally: Studies show that well-rested people are more productive. Should I go take a nap or should I ignore science like some sort of pointy-haired baboon? I like to synchronize my questions to his banana-eating.
Share May 15, 2008's comic on:
Dilbert: We just discovered that you assigned the same project to both of us a month ago. The Boss: Sometimes I do that when I think neither of you has more than a 50% chance of doing something right. Asok: Hey, I just discovered something. The Boss: Or 33.3%"
Share August 14, 2008's comic on:
The Boss says, "I don't need to know the details. Just give me the high altitude view." Dilbert says, "From a high altitude we're all a bunch of termites trying to eat the same log." The Boss says, "Maybe drill down a little more." Dilbert says, "The termites hate each other."