Other Warm Comic Strips - Page 8
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672 Results for Other Warm
View 71 - 80 results for other warm comic strips. Discover the best "Other Warm" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday June 13,
2011
Tags depression (mental state), despair, unfulfilled, totally worthless, coffee maker, breakroom, distract
Transcript
Asok: I am unfulfilled at my job. When does that feeling go away? Dilbert: Asok, you shouldn't think you're totally worthless. Asok: Um... I didn't say I was worthless. Dilbert: I'm trying to take your mind off of the other thing.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Monday July 11,
2011
Tags anxiety, frustration, implications, offend by complimenting, rational
Transcript
Tina: You offended me when you said Ted did a great job. It implied that I'm important. Dilbert: Are you saying I can offend you by complimenting other people? Tina: Exactly. Dilbert: Wally, you're very rational today. Wally: Thank you!
Sunday August 14,
2011
Tags business ethics, research facilities, work home, 2 days, twice as prodcutive, elaborate science experiment, commute to sit in box, control group, frustration
Transcript
Dilbert: Can I work at home for two days per week? I can be twice as productive, and happier at the same time. Boss: I probably shouldn't tell you this... but you're part of an elaborate science experiment to see how much frustrations it takes to kill employees. Why else would the company make you commute for two hours a day just to sit in a tiny box? Don't feel bad: no one told me either. I had to piece it together from the evidence. Now I do my part to keep the experiment moving along. Dilbert: Other people work from home. Boss: Are you referring to the control group?
Saturday August 06,
2011
Tags business ethics, clubs, meetings, society for the preservation of evil ideas, file patents, sue for infringement, embezzle, Entertainment
Transcript
Dogbert: Welcome to the monthly meeting of "The Society for the Preservation of Evil Ideas." Our goal for the coming year is to convince companies to file absurdly broad patents and sue each other for infringing. CIO: How do we make money from that? Dogbert: Beats me. I'm just here to embezzle your dues.
Monday October 03,
2011
Tags couples, dating, play games, guess the lie, say 2 things, dating games, obvious things, relationships
Transcript
Woman: Let's play a game. We each say two things about ourselves and the other has to guess which one is a lie. Dilbert: I love to play games like that. My second thing is that I eat food.
Thursday October 06,
2011
Tags computers & peripherals, gadgets, hardware, robotic arms, hold coffee cups, industry changing products
Transcript
Wally: One percent of engineers create all of the industry - changing products. I propose replacing the other 99% with robotic arms that hold coffee cups. You won't see any of the laggards in the 99% come up with great ideas like this one.
Thursday November 10,
2011
Tags employees, executives, busy converting, lower morle, stirring up trouble, departments, undercommunicating, business
Transcript
Carol: He's busy converting everything you did this year into a complete waste of time. After that, he's scheduled to lower our morale. Then he'll be stirring up trouble in other departments. Dilbert: How's tomorrow look? Carol: He'll be under-communicating all day.
Monday January 02,
2012
Tags business ethics, lobbying, lobbiest, bribers, holiday, birthdays, lucrative job, tax breaks, company tax breaks, interview
Transcript
Man: Your lobbyist said I could have a lucrative job here someday if I support tax breaks for your company. I have offers from other bribers, so I thought I'd stop by and see how this dump compares. Dilbert: Suddenly I know too much. Man: Fetch me some coffee and I'll make your birthday a holiday.
Monday March 05,
2012
Tags sales personnel, pretend, helpful, awkwardly upsell, listening, refrigerator, ice
Transcript
Dilbert is shopping. A salesman approaches him and says "Do you mind if I pretend to be helpful while I awkwardly try to upsell you?" Dilbert replies "Nope. Do you mind if I pretend to be listening while I think about other things?" "Cool," says the salesman. Dilbert thinks to himself "I'm glad I don't have your job." The salesman asks him "How old is your refrigerator? Do you like ice?"
Tuesday March 06,
2012
Tags copyright & trademark, earmuffs for oysters, insane, lawsuit monkey, lawyer, legal
Transcript
Salesman: Do you mind if I pretend to be helpful while I awkwardly try to upsell you? Dilbert: Nope. Do you mind if I pretend to be listening while I think about other things? Salesman: Cool. Dilbert: I'm glad I don't have your job. Salesman: How old is your refrigerator? Do you like ice?