Finish Comic Strips - Page 8

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125 Results for Finish

View 71 - 80 results for finish comic strips. Discover the best "Finish" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 26, 2010's comic on:


Tags #project plan, #failure, #slide, #complicated, #trade show, #vortex of failure

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Dilbert says, "Our project plan is so complicated that failure is assured." Dilbert says, "But complexity is too abstract for you to manage, so instead you will spray me energy into the vortex of failure." Dilbert says, "Go." The Boss says, "I need you to finish it six weeks sooner for a trade show."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 16, 2011's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #meetings, #optimism, #vice presdient, #unoccupied room, #cell phone, #finish soon, #nap in cubilce, #get work done, #run errands, #optimism like disappointement, #technology

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The Boss says, "Our meeting room is being used by a vice president." The Boss says, "I need all of you to search for an unoccupied room. Call my cell when you find one." The Boss says, "I'll stay here in case they finish soon." Dilbert says, "Where are you going to look?" Wally says, "I'm going to take a nap in my cubicle and hope the problem takes care of itself." Dilbert says, "Good idea. I'll go get some work done." Alice says, "Perfect time to run some errands." The Boss says, "Optimism is a lot like disappointment."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 11, 2011's comic on:


Tags #computer software, #internet & world wide web, #coding, #paywall, #website, #wrote script, #new content, #idea to eliminate, #revenue, #lowered costs, #technology

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Boss: Wally, did you finish coding the paywall for our website? Wally: I did something better. I wrote a script to delete any new content as soon as it's posted. At bonus time, keep in mind that you're the one who had the idea to eliminate revenue, and I'm the one who lowered hosting costs.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 11, 2011's comic on:


Tags #boredom, #despair, #mind numbing tesk, #stop thinking

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Asok: I can't wait to finish this mind-numbing task... so I can start another mind-numbing task. I really need to stop thinking.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2012's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #multitasking, #ignorant bafoon, #coffee, #authority, #business

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Carol: I can't finish everything today. Boss: Try multitasking. Carol: Multitasking? Is that like being an ignorant baboon and drinking coffee at the same time? Boss: I missed what you said because I was drinking coffee.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 03, 2012's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #work all night, #inspiring employees, #clearly defined roles, #business

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Boss: We'll finish this project even if we have to work all night! Well, I just did my job of inspiring you, so I might as well go home. How do you like our clearly defined roles now?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 10, 2012's comic on:


Tags #dating, #mobile (cell) phones, #humiliation, #disrespect, #company, #relationships, #business

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Dilbert: Do you mind if i check something on my phone? Woman: Why would I mind the humiliation and disrespect of being with a man who prefers the company of his phone? Dilbert: That's the sort of attitude that makes you finish second to my phone.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 28, 2012's comic on:


Tags #wages, #compensation, #achieving goals, #debating, #money

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Boss: Your compensation will be based on achieving these goals. Dilbert: Awesome. It's like written permission to ignore everything else you ask me to do. Boss: It's not like that at all. Dilbert: Get back to me when you finish debating yourself.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 15, 2012's comic on:


Tags #meetings, #finish tasks, #communication skills, #poor skills, #task, #breakdown, #work, #delgatation

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Boss: Did you finish the tasks we talked about in the last meeting? Dilbert: No, because your communication skills are so poor that I had no idea I was supposed to do a task. Wally: Did I have a task?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 08, 2013's comic on:


Tags #absent mindedness, #frustration, #design, #specs, #deadlines, #schedule, #incompetence

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Coworker: Did you finish the design according to my specs? Dilbert: Yep. Coworker: Hypothetically, if I had forgotten to mention several features, would that be a problem? And let's say the deadline is still the same. Dilbert: No problem. I always plan my schedule around your incompetence.