Hr Approval Comic Strips - Page 8

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View 71 - 80 results for hr approval comic strips. Discover the best "Hr Approval" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #catbert the hr director, #groom for management, #bugs in fur, #lick head, #can't be manager

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Caption: Catbert the H.R. Director. Asok the intern sits at his computer. Catbert stands on Asok's desk. Catbert says, "Asok, it's time to groom you for management." Catbert looks through Asok's hair. Catbert says, "I don't see too many bugs in your fur. Can you lick the top of your own head?" Asok frowns. Asok says, "No, I can't." Catbert says, "Then you can't be a manager."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #hr director, #not allowed, #eat desk, #semi plausible reason, #hate

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Caption: Catbert: H.R. Director. Catbert sits at his computer. Catbert types, "New policy: Employees are not allowed to eat at their desks." Catbert thinks, "Because why? I need a semi-plausible reason." Catbert writes, "Because I hate you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #hr director, #tiny raises, #nothing to motivate, #alice complains

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Caption: "Catbert: H.R. Director" Alice sits in a chair across from Catbert's desk. Alice with her arms out says, "I work hard, but all I get are tiny raises." Catbert says, "If we gave you everything you wanted, then you would have nothing to motivate you." ALice says, "I don't want to be motivated." Catbert says, "That's why I enjoy doing it!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #hr director, #sends wally home, #wearing shorts, #skinhead accuse, #evil

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Title reads, "Catbert: H.R. Director." Catbert says to Wally, "Wally, I'm sending you home. Shorts are not acceptable dress." Wally responds, as we see that his pants are simply too short, "These are not shorts!" As Catbert walks away, purring, he thinks, "Tomorrow I'll accuse him of being a skinhead."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cat bert, #hr dorector, #nput of employees, #morons, #sing loudly, #thinking, #pinball wizard

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Caption: "Catbert: H.R. Director" Catbert says, to Asok, "I value the input of all employees..." Catbert says, "....including the morons. Although in those cases, I cover my ears and sing loudly>" Asok says, "So I was thinking maybe..." Catbert begins to sing, "He's a pinball wizard"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #hr director, #boss treats, #furniture, #dangerous predent, #new position, #tried crounching

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Caption: Catbert: H.R. Director" Allan is in Catbert's office. He has a lapm strapped to his back. Allan says. "My boss treats me like furniture." Catbert says, "I'd help you, but it might set a dangerous precedent." Allan says, "I need a new position." Catbert says, "Have you tried crouching?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #blame others, #Catbert, #evil hr director, #oversized head, #problem, #tight pantyhose, #low morale

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Caption: "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert says, to Alice, "Alice, you blame others for your low morale." Catbert points at Alice and says, "BUT THE REAL PROBLEM IS YOUR TIGHT PANTYHOSE!!" Alice says, "I don't think so." CAtbert says, "Then how do you explain your oversized head?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #kill coworker, #employee manual, #award for cost saving, #evil hr director

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Caption "Catbert: evil h.r. director" Alice sits in Catbert's office. Catbert says, "Alice, did you kill another co-worker?" Alice says, "Yes." Catbert looks in the Employee Manual and says, "But you did not discriminate, sexually harass, steal or take drugs. hmmmm.." Catbert says, "It looks like I have to give you an award for your cost saving idea." Alice says, "Thank you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #shooting credenza, #tina was bad, #card board, #special hat, #suspended, #sentence

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Caption: "Catbert"evil hr Director" Tina sits in catbert's office. Catbert says, "Tina, you are accused of shooting the CIO's credenza five times." Catbert scribbles with a pencil on a piece of paper and says, "I'm writing "Tina was bad" on this cardboard. I order you to attach it to a special hat for two weeks." Tina wears a hat with a stick that hangs over her head. The sign hangs off the stick. Dilbert says, "How did it go?" Tina says, "I got a suspended sentence."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #hr dept., #views of management, #exceeds expectations, #renamed, #drool, #loser, #die die die, #category changes, #performance review

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CATBERT: EVIl Director of Human Resources Catbert is walking through the office carrying a paper thinking, "I love my job." He walks into Wally's cubicle and says, "Hello, hapless employee." He continues, "I've renamed the four levels of employee performance..." "...To accurately reflect the views of management." Catbert reading from his paper, "The category of "exceeds expectations" is renamed to..." "..."At least he or she doesn't drool on himself or herself."..." He continues, "..."Meets expectations will be called "loser". "Does not meet expectations" will now be called "Die! Die! Die!"..." Catbert is walking off thinking, "I could send it out by e-mail but I enjoy seeing the looks on their faces."