Lying Down Comic Strips - Page 8
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702 Results for Lying Down
View 71 - 80 results for lying down comic strips. Discover the best "Lying Down" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday August 17,
1991
Tags Dilbert, car, salesman, Dogbert, lying, part, crime, pay, retired, readers digest, special, story
Transcript
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I quit my job as a used car salesman." Dilbert asks, "Because you couldn't keep lying?" Dogbert replies, "No, the lying was good. I liked that part." Dilbert asks, "Was it because crime doesn't pay?" Dogbert says, "I made $400,000 this week. I'm retired now." Dilbert says, "I don't think this will ever be a 'Reader's Digest' very special story."
Tuesday August 20,
1991
Tags Dogbert, rich, money, wallow, mud, puddle, bored, ever, get
Transcript
Dogbert walks on a sidewalk thinking, "I love being rich." Dogbert says to a passerby, "I'll give you ten thousand dollars if you wallow in that mud puddle." As the man lies face down in the mud, Dogbert says, "I don't see how rich people ever get bored."
Thursday September 05,
1991
Tags Dogbert, worried, teenager, trees, declare, war, norway, pimple, attack, drafted
Transcript
A caption identifies a young man as a "worried teenager." Dogbert approaches the teenager on the sidewalk and asks, "What's wrong with you?" The boy replies, "WOOD . . . What happens if we cut down all the trees?? We'll have to declare war on Norway and take their wood! I'll be drafted! I hate fiords." Dogbert yells, "Pimple attack!" A huge pimple sprouts on the boy's face.
Thursday September 12,
1991
Tags Dogbert, george lucas, ken, barbie dolls, wrapped, aluminum, air, space, writing
Transcript
Dogbert and George Lucas walk down a hallway in a movie studio. Lucas says, "My first film was the 1969 moon landing." Lucas shows Dogbert a globe, an astronaut doll and a model rocket. Lucas says, "The spacemen were actually Barbie dolls wrapped in aluminum foil." Lucas plays with two dolls and says, "Help! Ken! Help! I'm out of air! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!!" Dogbert says, "I guess you had help with the writing."
Saturday September 21,
1991
Tags park bench, Dogbert, parties, lift, heavy, sound, dumb, body, builder, pay
Transcript
Dogbert sits on a park bench next to a muscular man. The large man says, "It's not easy to be a professional body builder." The man continues, "At parties, people ask what I do. I have to say 'I lift heavy things, then I put them down.' It makes me sound dumb." Dogbert asks, "How's the pay?" The man asks, "Pay?"
Sunday September 22,
1991
Tags Dogbert, dinosaur, fish, with, legs, life, form, work, hard, part, mate, Kids, mutants, arm, dangerfield
Transcript
Dogbert walks in the park. A fish with legs comes walking down the path. The fish says, "Howdy!" Dogbert says, "I've never seen a fish with legs." The fish explains, "I'm evolving into a higher life form." Dogbert says, "That sounds like a lot of work." The fish says, "Yeah . . . The hard part is finding a mate who isn't turned off by legs." The fish continues, "With any luck, the kids will be mutants too." The fish continues, "I'm hoping they'll have arms but not look too much like Rodney Dangerfield." The fish stands at the edge of a pond. He tells a female fish, "These legs are a natural advantage!" The female says, "Oh, that's original."
Friday October 04,
1991
Tags elbonia, elbonians, yergi, scrolls, dog, fall, sky, never, shave, duck, literal, interpret
Transcript
In Elbonia, Dogbert lies face-down in the mud in front of his crashed hover-saucer. An Elbonian points at him and says, "Look, Yergi." The Elbonian picks Dogbert up and says, "The Holy Scrolls say a dog will fall from the sky." The other Elbonian asks, "They do?" The Elbonian carrying Dogbert replies, "Actually, they say 'never shave your duck,' but it's not literal. You have to interpret." The other Elbonian asks, "You mean I CAN shave my duck?!"
Sunday October 06,
1991
Tags Dogbert, nuclear, bomb, much, deal, government, reduce, national, debt, liberal, hissy, fit
Transcript
Dogbert walks past a man in a trench coat standing on a street corner. The man says, "Psst . . ." The secret agent asks, "Want to buy a nuclear bomb?" Dogbert asks, "How much?" The man replies, "Twenty bucks." Dogbert says, "Deal." Dogbert hands over the money and asks, "Does the government know about this?" The man replies, "I am the government." The man says, "It's the only way we could agree on to reduce the national debt . . . You wouldn't believe how many of these things we have." Dogbert walks down the sidewalk carrying his bomb. Several other people on the street are also carrying bombs. Dogbert thinks, "I'm glad I got mine before some liberal has a hissy fit."
Saturday October 12,
1991
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, elbonians, elbonia, making, decisions, paper-rock, scissors, olympic, agree, rules, wourse, mittens, point
Transcript
Dilbert says to Dogbert, "You've got to step down as King of Elbonia. These people are capable of making their own decisions." An Elbonian says, "The Paper-Rock-Scissors Olympics are canceled. We couldn't agree on the rules." The Elbonian continues, "And of course, we all wear mittens . . ." Dogbert asks Dilbert, "What was your point?"
Monday November 04,
1991
Tags Dilbert, pencil, electric, sharpener, excalibert, whoever, remove, ceo, co-worker
Transcript
Dilbert says to a man, "Somebody left a pencil in the electric sharpener." The man replies, "That's 'Excalibert.'" The man continues, "Legend has it that whoever can remove Excalibert from the sharpener will become CEO." Dilbert removes the pencil and asks, "Like this?" A beam of light shines down on the pencil.


