Managers & Supervisors Comic Strips - Page 8

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

396 Results for Managers & Supervisors

View 71 - 80 results for managers & supervisors comic strips. Discover the best "Managers & Supervisors" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #engineer, #good manager, #leads by example, #managers & supervisors, #middle manager, #monster truck rallies, #suspicion, #teaching, #education, #business, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: A goo manager leads by example. How does it help an engineer to see an example of how to be a middle manager? Dilbert: That's like teaching physics by showing examples of monster truck rallies. Alice: Should we say dumb things, too, or have you not started leading by example yet? Wally: Now what is he doing/ Are we supposed to do that? Dilbert: I think he's leading by example now! Boss: I'm starting to wonder if everything I read on the Internet is wrong.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #ephermal middel manager, #look stupid, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Say hello to the ephemeral middle manager. But hurry because he won't last long. Dilbert: Hi, I'm... Boss: Now you just look stupid.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #honesty, #managers & supervisors, #secret of success, #plan b, #two hairballs, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Asok, the secret to success is making your boss look good. Asok: What if my boss looks like two hairballs on an infected bladder? There's no way to make that look good. Boss: You're not off to a strong start. Asok: Please tell me there's a Plan B.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #frustration, #hypocrisy, #managers & supervisors, #shut out, #meetings, #unsolvable, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Asok, I can't promote you because the other managers don't know you. Asok: That's because you shut me out of meetings and take credit for my work. Boss: That sounds unsolvable.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #obliviousness, #two ways to fail, #miss deadlines, #quality of work, #active non listening, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: You've given me so many projects that I have two ways to fail. I can either miss all of my deadlines or I can reduce the quality of my work to rubbish. Which do you prefer? Boss: The class I took in active non-listening is really paying off. I need this by Tuesday.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #managers & supervisors, #company policy, #rate staff, #no upper body strength, #real reason, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Company policy says I have to rate one-third of my staff as "Does not meet expectations." I chose the two of you because you have no upper body strength. This way it's safer if you go berzerk. I thought you said I should tell them the reason I picked them. Catbert: Not the real reason.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #time estimate, #propsal, #win bid, #wet sponge, #insulted me, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I adjusted your time estimate on the proposal from two years to one so we could win the bid. I plan to make up the time by squeezing you like a wet sponge that insulted me. Then the wet sponge insulted me.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers & supervisors, #new procurement policy, #p.o.o.p., #thinking, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: It took us three days at the executive retreat to come up with a name for our new procurement policy. We named it the "Procurement Operations Oversight Policy." Dilbert: P.O.O.P.? Boss: Do you know how many managers it takes to come up with a good name? Dilbert: A few more than you had?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #managers & supervisors, #ethics course, #failed ethics, #engineer, #grasp, #fast track, #management, #corrupt, #business, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You failed the online ethics course for the third time. You can't be an engineer for this company if you have no grasp of business ethics. You leave me no choice. I'm putting you on the management fast track. Wally: Huh.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business ethics, #coffee & tea, #managers & supervisors, #brain scan, #management potential, #warm brown liquid, #speed evolved, #coffee reservoir, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Your brain scan shows tremendous management potential. The part of your brain that would normally control ethics is filled with some sort of warm, brown liquid. It appears that you speed-evolved part of your brain into a coffee reservoir. Wally: People think I don't have a plan.