Positive Attitude Comic Strips - Page 8

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86 Results for Positive Attitude

View 71 - 80 results for positive attitude comic strips. Discover the best "Positive Attitude" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 12, 2014's comic on:


Tags #conversation, #executives, #leadership, #acceptable behavior, #alight goals, #company objectives, #deal directly, #conflict, #maintain positive attitude, #impressive

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CEO: Who's up for some leadership? Watch me define acceptable behavior, align your goals with company objectives, prioritize respect, deal directly with conflict, maintain a positive attitude, and pretend to care! Wally: That would be impressive. CEO: Settle down, Bilbo.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 16, 2014's comic on:


Tags #internet & world wide web, #movies, #clever video, #create video, #internet, #go viral, #marketing experts, #engineer, #more passion, #loser attitude, #viral video, #Entertainment, #technology, #engineering

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Boss: I want you to create a clever video about our product for the Internet. But make sure it goes viral or you're a total failure. Dilbert: No one can predict what goes viral. Marketing experts fail at this sort of thing 99% of the time. I'm an engineer with no relevant skills for this assignment. Boss: Maybe you could succeed if you had more passion. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! I need a rational boss, not passion! Boss: That's sort of a loser attitude. Asok: Hey, my video is going viral!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 2014's comic on:


Tags #good attitude award, #stupid award, #screamed, #nominated, #award, #peer voting, #next month, #employees, #boss, #business

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Boss: Alice, you've been nominated by your peers for the "good attitude award." Alice: Get out of here with your stupid, useless award!!! Boss: Maybe I shouldn't let peers do the voting. Wally: I like her odds to win again next month.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 08, 2014's comic on:


Tags #frustration, #mental health, #work ethic, #bad attitude, #70 hr. wk.week, #hire insane, #whistle, #happy tune

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Boss: You have a bad attitude lately. Alice: You made me work 70 hours this week. If you want people who work for free and are happy about it, hire the insane. Boss: I tried that, but I got the wrong kind. Alice: I'll whistle a happy tune if you go away.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 01, 2015's comic on:


Tags #fitness, #martial arts, #violence, #fighting, #yoga, #misunderstanding, #exercise, #fusion, #danger, #health

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Dilbert: I'm almost positive yoga is not one of the martial arts. Boss: Not by itself. We're learning a defensive style of yoga that incorporates the more violent elements of feng shui and Irish dancing. Dilbert: That doesn't sound lethal. Boss: Put your head on the ground and say that again.

Robots Continue To Be Flawless

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Robots Continue To Be Flawless - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 10, 2015's comic on:


Tags #robot, #technology, #ego, #intelligence, #artificial intelligence, #competition, #perfection

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Robot: For the hundredth week in a row, I performed my tasks perfectly. Meanwhile, you idiots acted in ways that can only be described as random. Boss: You've had a bad attitude since you beat me on the Turing test. Robot: Ten times out of ten.

Dilbert Becomes Quasimodo

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Dilbert Becomes Quasimodo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 09, 2016's comic on:


Tags #hunchback, #posture, #slouch, #attitude, #psychology

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Dilbert: This job is turning me into Quasimodo. Tina: Is it mostly a posture thing, or do you have some of the Quasi's attitude as well? Dilbert; What's wrong with my posture? Tina: I could ask you what's wrong with his attitude.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 11, 2016's comic on:


Tags #health, #morning, #waking up, #sleepless, #complaining, #manager, #sociopath, #emotions

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Boss: Can you take a call with our Elbonian customers at 6 a.m. tomorrow? Dilbert: Sure. All I need to do is put my health at risk by not getting enough sleep tonight. Of course, I'll hate your guts for making me come to work so early. And I would expect my bad attitude to infect my co-workers and make them less productive, too. My lack of sleep will affect my decision-making, obviously. And I"m working on important projects, so the ripple effect could be catastrophic. So, do you still want me to be here at 6 a.m. tomorrow? Boss: Yes. You don't have to be a sociopath to be a manager, but it helps.

Naming The Spaceship

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Naming The Spaceship - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 27, 2016's comic on:


Tags #naming, #space, #space flight, #rocket, #engineering, #failure, #death, #medical

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Ted: I'm looking for a name for the spaceship that I designed. Dilbert: How about "Death Tube?" Alice: "Space Debris?" Wally: "Final Resting Place?" Ted: I was hoping for something more positive. Voice: We're positive it will explode.

It's Like You Never Existed

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It's Like You Never Existed - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 01, 2017's comic on:


Tags #supervisor, #manager, #false comparison

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Alice: I spent the past week fixing a critical bug in the software that I forgot to tell you about. Boss: In a way, it's like you never existed. Alice: No, it's not like that at all. Boss: And you have a bad attitude on top of all that.