dilbert video call on cell phone.
dilbert: should i call you ted, or do you prefer your office nickname? i only ask because your nickname is insulting, so i just wanted to make sure you were okay with me using it.
ted: i have an office nickname?
dilbert thinking: aaand we're off to a bad start.
boss on video call.
boss: how many of you would prefer going back to work in the office instead of working at home?
voices from laptop: i'd rather be dead.
boss walking in living room thinking: i knew it was a mistake to let them taste happiness.
salesman: i'll need you to sign a nondisclosure agreement before i can show you our new product.
dilbert: you wasted a trip here because i won't be doing that. the fact that you even asked me to sign an nda tells me your company is incompetent.
dilbert: i prefer giving my business to a vendor who can show me their product without getting a lawyer involved.
salesman: you could sign it without having your lawyer review it.
dilbert yelling: do i look like an idiot?
salesman holding out nda toward dilbert.
dilbert: well? do i?
salesman: only form your chin to your forehead area.