Asok Admires Wally Comic Strips - Page 8

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View 71 - 80 results for asok admires wally comic strips. Discover the best "Asok Admires Wally" comics from Dilbert.com.

Twizzle The Flurm

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Twizzle The Flurm - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 05, 2019's comic on:


Tags #confused, #employees, #engineering, #managers & supervisors, #office workers

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Boss: The engineers think I don't understand what they do all day. Catbert: Maybe it's because you don't. Boss: You too? Wally: My project is late because I had to twizzle the flurm. Boss: Okay, that sounds right.

Boxes With Names

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Boxes With Names - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 02, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #meetings, #office workers, #suspicious, #layoff

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Boss: The rumors of a major layoff are completely untrue. Dilbert: Why did the facilities management people just deliver a huge load of cardboard boxes to the break room? Boss: You can never have too many boxes. Dilbert: Why does every box have an employee name on it?

Boss Has A Vision For The Company

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Boss Has A Vision For The Company - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 26, 2018's comic on:


Tags #managers & supervisors, #obliviousness, #office workers, #sarcasm, #listen

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Boss: And that's my vision for the company. Dilbert: All you did was list the projects we are already working on while making it sound like astrology. Boss: In my defense, I didn't think any of you were listening.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 23, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #employees, #employment, #managers & supervisors, #video games

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Boss: The job market is so tight that I had to hire this NPC. Dilbert: NPC? Boss: Non-player character. It's a video game term for a character that is programmed.As opposed to being an avatar for a human player. An NPC has limited programmed responses. Watch this. How's your day going? NPC: Not bad for a Monday. Boss: Can you help me on my project? NPC: I am too busy: Boss: What do you think of management? NPC: They are all dumb. Wally: I just bonded with that thing. Boss: See how fast you get used to it?

Contacting The Alien Probe

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Contacting The Alien Probe - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 21, 2018's comic on:


Tags #aliens, #communication, #earth, #space, #technology

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Dilbert: We're ready to fire up our laser communication technology to contact the alien probe heading to Earth. Boss: Is the alien probe unmanned? Dilbert: It is now.

Cake Is Healthy

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Cake Is Healthy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 14, 2018's comic on:


Tags #cake, #diet, #employees, #employment, #health, #health food, #office, #office workers

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Boss: We're launching a health and wellness initiative for employees this week. In other news, we have cake in the break room to celebrate all of the birthdays this month. Dilbert: Because cake is healthy? Boss: Learn to compartmentalize.

Jargon

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Jargon - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 06, 2018's comic on:


Tags #confusion, #employees, #irritation, #language, #meetings, #sarcasm

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Man: This was a great meeting. Are there any questions? Dilbert: I didn't understand any of the jargon you used for the past hour, so I have no idea what this meeting was about. Man: Why didn't you say something sooner? Dilbert: That's a good strategy for people who have hope.

Wally's Doctor Note

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Wally's Doctor Note - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 05, 2018's comic on:


Tags #boss, #doctors, #employees, #excuses, #work, #writing

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Wally: Here's the note from my doctor that you asked for. Boss: I can't read the handwriting. Wally: That's how you know it's a real doctor's note. Boss: What's it say. Wally: It says I need lots of sleep at work.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 02, 2018's comic on:


Tags #business, #decision, #executives, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #success, #manipulation

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CEO: Profits have increased thirty percent under my leadership. Dilbert: Snort. CEO: What? Dilbert: All you do is pick the best plans from the options we show you. CEO: Exactly, and I pick the best plan every time. Dilbert: That's because we only show you the best plans compared to the worst plans we can think of. We control every decision you make by manipulating your perception of the options. CEO: We need to fix that. Dilbert: How do you fix something that isn't broken?

Sending Email At Night

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Sending Email At Night - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 28, 2018's comic on:


Tags #email, #employees, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm

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Asok: I keep working hard, but no one notices. Wally: That's why I send out department-wide emails at around midnight every night. Asok: I didn't know you work at home every night. Wally: Do I need to speak slower here?