Beyond Communication Comic Strips - Page 8

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100 Results for Beyond Communication

View 71 - 80 results for beyond communication comic strips. Discover the best "Beyond Communication" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 19, 2006's comic on:


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"Welcome to Dogbert's communication seminar." "Today you will learn how to use your Blackberry while pretending to listen." "Now repeat after me: Uh-huh, yeah, uh-huh. What was he thinking? Wow!" click click click click

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"Alice, I'm sending you to a communication class." "Because I've noticed that your words often say one thing while your body language says another." "Frankly, it's creepy." "Thank you. I appreciate the useful feedback."

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Share March 29, 2006's comic on:


Tags #outsourcing, #design, #communication, #miscommunication, #manufacturing, #obliviousness, #marketing, #business

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We ship our new mp3 player in two days. How's the Elbonian factory coming along? "The prototype is the size of a small tractor and it will only play Elbonian polkas." "I'll budget a little extra for marketing." "It's made of asbestos."

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Share July 08, 2005's comic on:


Tags #keep spitting, #disagree, #people, #happy, #crazy one, #men communication

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Dilbert: Do you think it's fair that you keep spitting on me just because you disagree with what I say? Girl: why am I the one who always has to change o make there people happy? Dilbert: Because you're the crazy one. girl: Now you're all quiet, why can't men learn to communicate.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 16, 2004's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #improve communication, #imitates boss, #business

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Man: I called this meeting so I could tell you the division's goals for next year. Alice: Thats a good idea because we're all so dumb that we coldly possibly read this in email. Goal one: Improve communication. ALiceL I can't. Im too dumb.

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Share November 22, 2003's comic on:


Tags #more with less, #motivation, #communication, #more specific

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The Boss: Our goal is to do more with less. Wally: Less motivation? The Boss: I can't be more specific. wally: Less communication?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 28, 2003's comic on:


Tags #employee moral survey, #open, #honest, #communication from management, #death spiral, #looting comaony, #noise, #fishing lures, #e, #ploys suffer, #boss likes hurting, #sick boss, #negative force

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"I have the results of the employee morale survey." "The number one issue is 'not enough open and honest communication from management.'" "Well, okay. I'm willing to give that a try." "Management is looting the company while hiding the fact that we're in a death spiral." "Whenever you talk, I think about fishing lures until the noise stops." "When I see an employee suffer, it excites me in ways I don't understand." "On nine separate occasions I've fired bald guys because I thought they were you." "If this doesn't work for you. Let me know on next employee morale survey."

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Share November 18, 2002's comic on:


Tags #customers into sheep, #device, #buy whatever, #free wool, #marketing dept

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Dilbert is meeting with a coworker. The coworker says, "The marketing department wants you to build a device that turns customers into sheep." Dilbert asks, "Why? So they'll buy whatever we tell them to buy?" The coworker responds, "To be honest, we haven't given it much thought beyond free wool."

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Share October 13, 2002's comic on:


Tags #communication, #integrity, #teamwork, #pyramid pillars, #team memeber idiots, #honest opinion, #team player, #agree bad ideas, #two legged stool

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The Boss points to a slide and says, "The three pillars of our pyramid are communication, integrity, and teamwork." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question: Since when do pyramids have pillars?" The Boss responds, "Answer: Shut up." Alice raises her hand and says, "Problem: All of my team members are idiots." Alice continues, "If I communicate my honest opinion of their ideas, I won't be a team player." Alice continues, "But if I pretend to agree with their bad ideas, I won't have integrity." Alice continues, "So instead of being a pyramid, can I be a two-legged stool like you?" Dilbert turns to Alice and says, "Wow! That was much better than my pillar question." Wally asks Alice, "Aren't I on your team?"

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Share June 14, 2002's comic on:


Tags #engineering decison, #project, #need to act, #fiber capacity, #serial input, #meeting, #communication problems, #table, #business

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The Boss says to Dilbert, "I needed to make an engineering decision about your project this morning." The Boss continues, "You'll need to act like you agree with it so I don't look stupid." Dilbert is at a meeting. A coworker turns to Dilbert and says, "Explain to us how fiber capacity can be increased by serial input at breakfast."