Comprehend Both Problem Comic Strips - Page 8

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

543 Results for Comprehend Both Problem

View 71 - 80 results for comprehend both problem comic strips. Discover the best "Comprehend Both Problem" comics from Dilbert.com.

Smart People Are On Both Sides

Thank you for voting.
Smart People Are On Both Sides - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 30, 2016's comic on:


Tags #Politics, #intelligence, #appearances, #perspective

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Have you ever noticed that there are smart people on both sides of every political issue? Boss: Maybe it only seems that way to you because you're not one of the smart ones. Dilbert: Do I seem smart? Wally: I didn't realize you were trying.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 22, 2016's comic on:


Tags #dating, #overanalyzing, #asking out, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Woman: Do you want to go to dinner and a movie with me on Friday? Dilbert: That plan is poorly conceived. The best time to watch a movie is also the best time to eat. And what are the odds we want to see the same movie? You're a picky eater, so it would be a nightmare to decide where we both want to eat. One of us would have to compromise, and I assume it would be me. I'm offended by your offer to suboptimize my Friday experience. Woman: Do you have a better option? Dilbert: Nope. See you Friday.

Boss Figures Out A System

Thank you for voting.
Boss Figures Out A System - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 17, 2016's comic on:


Tags #management, #managing, #problems, #work, #workload, #solution, #problem-solving

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I'm bored. Boss: Here's some more work. Alice: I'm overwhelmed with work. Boss: Here's some more work. Boss: Managing was hard until I figured out a system.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 03, 2016's comic on:


Tags #Advice, #advising, #teenagers, #parents, #Parenting, #tattoo, #piercing, #terrorism, #boundaries

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: My teenager wants to pierce his ear. Should I let him? Dilbert: Sure. It's only a tiny hole and it heals. Carol: Good point. Narrator: Next day. Carol: Now he wants a small tattoo. Dilbert: Well, if it doesn't show... Narrator: Next week. Carol: Now he wants to grow a human ear on his back, the way scientists did with that rat. Dilbert: As long as he can cover it with a shirt when he gets a job, I see no problem. You have to let him live his own life. Narrator: One week later. Carol: He joined ISIS. Dilbert: I forgot to mention that I'm no good at giving advice.

Asok Is The Only Good Negotiator

Thank you for voting.
Asok Is The Only Good Negotiator - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 12, 2016's comic on:


Tags #accuse, #eric scott, #haggle, #lable, #money, #negotiating, #negotiation, #racism, #racist, #raise, #guest artist

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Did you both negotiate huge raises with our boss the way I did? Dilbert and Wally: No. Dilbert: Apparently, you're the only good negotiator in the department. Asok: Are you being racist? Dilbert: I will give you $1,000 to never say that about me again.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 24, 2016's comic on:


Tags #gestures, #etiquette, #male, #Men, #masculinity, #social norms

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I never know the right time to high-five. I feel as if I should automatically know, like a male instinct. For example, when do you initiate a high-five and when do you simply yell "woo-hoo?" Those situations look the same to me. What's my problem? Alice: So many things. But in this specific case, the problem is your total lack of masculinity. Dilbert: High-five?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 17, 2016's comic on:


Tags #sexism, #sexist, #misogyny, #conversation, #talking

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: You give Wally your full attention when he talks, but not me. You hang on every word the man says. But if I try to talk, you act distracted in five seconds. Wally gets more eye contact, too. You don't even look at me half the time I'm talking. Deep down, in your DNA, you know you are a sexist because you don't take me seriously when I speak to you. There is no other explanation, so don't insult me by trying. Dilbert: I give both of you the same amount of attention, but you spread it over more words. Alice: I hate both of you. Dilbert: Did I play that wrong? Wally: Yup.

Software Done Next Week

Thank you for voting.
Software Done Next Week - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 14, 2016's comic on:


Tags #excuse, #laziness, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Are you any farther along with the software? Wally: I discovered an unexpected problem. That set me back a week. Boss: You say the same thing every week. Wally: No one jumps off a winning horse.

After Work Activities

Thank you for voting.
After Work Activities - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 05, 2016's comic on:


Tags #misogyny, #sexism, #camaraderie, #personality, #complaining, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: The men never invite me to after-work activities. Catbert: We'll need to find out if the problem is sexism or your personality.Alice: I decided not to dig into it. Boss: I think you'll be happy with your decision.

The Problem Is People

Thank you for voting.
The Problem Is People - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 09, 2015's comic on:


Tags #failure, #human factor, #human error, #people, #misanthrope, #misanthropic, #teamwork

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I finished the post-mortem on our failed project. Boss: What was the problem. Dilbert: People. Boss: The wrong ones? Dilbert: Don't overthink it.