Emperor Has No Clothes Comic Strips - Page 8

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Emperor Has No Clothes

View 71 - 80 results for emperor has no clothes comic strips. Discover the best "Emperor Has No Clothes" comics from Dilbert.com.

Using Git

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Using Git - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #code, #developer

View Transcript

Transcript

the boss: i'm hearing that none of your code has been implemented. why are you so unproductive? dilbert: your new lead developer doesn't know how to use git and he keeps overwriting my patches. the boss: i don't know what any of that means. dilbert: well, thank you for stopping by.

View more books now

Nuclear Power Invention

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Nuclear Power Invention - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #money, #office, #office workers, #nuclear power

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: i invented a new type of nuclear power that has zero risk. dilbert: it can be built in one day for less that a thousand dollars and it can power a small city. the boss visually upset and yelling: get that thing out of here! dilbert: i expect it will be hard to sell.

Smart To Wait

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Smart To Wait - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #technology, #proposal

View Transcript

Transcript

i approved your technology proposal. dilbert: i made that proposal six months ago. now everything has changed and it no longer makes sense. the boss: well, i guess i was smart to wait. dilbert: the less you do, the better.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #failure, #inventions, #office workers, #power, #science, #success

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I predict fusion power will be a big deal in fifteen years. Man: Fusion reactors are impossible to build and always will be. Dilbert: Then why are a dozen startups working on it? Man: Everyone who ever tried to create a fusion reactor has failed so far. Dilbert: Thomas Edison failed many times at making a useful incandescent light bulb before he succeeded. Would you have advised him to give up after the first ten failed attempts? I eagerly await your irrational response. Man: Incandescent bulbs are bad for the environment. Dilbert: And there it is.

Asok's Employee Engagement

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Asok's Employee Engagement - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #employees, #managers & supervisors, #office workers, #work, #attitude, #expectations

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Asok, your employee engagement has been a bit soft this quarter. I expect a higher level of irrational enthusiasm for the endless string of thankless tasks you call your job. Asok: How's this? Boss: I also want to see an unnatural preference for work over leisure.

Never Give Reasons

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Never Give Reasons - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Advice, #debates, #internet, #Opinion, #social media, #idiot

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the Internet Debate Coach Dogbert: Never give reasons for your opinions. That only gives your opponent fodder for proving you're an idiot. Asok: Then how can I win a debate on social media? Dogbert: No one knows. It has never been done.

Old Sayings

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Old Sayings - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boss, #email, #insult, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #sayings

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I discovered I can insult our boss if I make it sound like an old saying. He thinks all old sayings are wise. Wally: Here he comes. Boss: Did you read my email? Dilbert: A man who sends email has nothing to say.

Co2 Scrubber Too Efficient

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Co2 Scrubber Too Efficient - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #earth, #mistake, #plants, #technology, #inventions, #atmosphere

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I've developed a super-efficient device that scrubs CO2 out of the air. But the user has to remember to turn it off after a few days or else it will remove too much CO2 and destroy all life on Earth. Man: Hey, who left this thing unplugged?

Robot Has A Cyborg

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Robot Has A Cyborg - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #insults, #Kids, #office workers, #robot, #technology, #smartphone

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Today I saw a kid on a hoverboard using a smartphone with headphones. It was like a creepy new species that is half-human and half-robot. Robot: That's my son. He's a cyborg. Alice: I'll report myself to human resources.

Best Product

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Best Product - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #criticism, #jokes, #meetings, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm, #presentation

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted: As you can see from this chart, our product has been rated number one for six years in a row. Dilbert: Why does your chart stop four years ago? Ted: I'll bet you don't get invited to a lot of parties. Dilbert: That's just a lucky guess.