Late Comic Strips - Page 8
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179 Results for Late
View 71 - 80 results for late comic strips. Discover the best "Late" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday November 12,
2010
Tags late, jacket, emails, parking lot, idiot, stupid questions, angry, grit teeth
Transcript
The Boss says, "You're two hours late." Wally says, "I was doing e-mail in the parking lot." Wally says, "I like to bang out a few hours of work before some idiot starts asking me dumb questions." Wally says, "It would be funny if the next thing you say is in the form of a question."
Monday July 05,
2010
Tags work-life balance, lazy, annoyed, clench teeth, angry
Transcript
Wally says, "I need to get some of that work-life balance I keep hearing about." Wally says, "I thought about work all last night at home, so what do I do now?" Wally says, "It's not too late to get in on this."
Wednesday April 28,
2010
Tags customer service, credit card expense, reimbursement, late fees, punish, devil, hell, rock, sit at computer
Transcript
Dilbert says, "It takes you two months to process my company credit card expense reimbursement." Dilbert says, "So I get in trouble every month for incurring late fees." Dilbert says, "Why must I be punished for your incompetence?" Devil says, "Apparently I'm awesome."
Monday April 26,
2010
Tags deadline, late, engineer code, lightsaber, kill, annoy, flashlight, yell, close eyes, mouth open, office
Transcript
Dilbert says, "I cannot meet your arbitrary deadline, so the engineer's code requires me to kill myself with a lightsaber." Dilbert says, "But lightsabers haven't been invented yet. The best I can do is annoy myself with a flashlight." The Boss says, "Could you do this in the hall?" Dilbert says, "Annoyance before dishonor!"
Monday February 15,
2010
Tags dead, afterlife, evicted, management, teach, learn, consultant, devil, late, status report, locusts, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "Technically, I was dead for a week. But I was evicted from the afterlife and had to come back." The Boss says, "The afterlife has a lot to teach us about management. I brought home a consultant." Dilbert says, "I might be late with my status report." The Boss says, "Do you know what locusts taste like?"
Tuesday December 22,
2009
Tags honeymoon, lying, business, marriage, comparing, relationships
Transcript
Dilbert says, "Our customer is asking for features we can't possibly deliver." The Boss says, "Say we can. We'll disappoint them later when it's too late to back out." Dilbert says, "Leaders don't like when you compare things to their honeymoons."
Tuesday December 08,
2009
Tags technology, changing, competition, submitting, management, delays
Transcript
The Boss says, "After eight months, senior management finally approved your project plan." Dilbert says, "It's too late. All of the technology has changed and our competitors have leapfrogged us." The Boss says, "Maybe you could write a new plan." Dilbert says, "Or we could get the same result by resubmitting this one."
Friday August 07,
2009
Tags reading, guide, Advice, guilt, annoyed
Transcript
Asok says, "According to the book of Wally, I should use something called 'Preemptive guilt' to avoid work." Wally says, "Exactly. If you wait until after you get an assignment, it is already too late for guilt." Wally says, "Stress killed both of my parents. The doctors said they worked too hard."q
Tuesday July 28,
2009
Tags retirement, planning, greed, celebrating, layoffs
Transcript
Dogbert the CEO Dogbert says, "I'm nearing retirement, so fire the research and development group." Dogbert says, "The cost cutting will goose my stock options so I can cash out before the death spiral." The boss says, "Please don't make the noise." Dogbert says, "Too late! Cha-Ching!"
Saturday May 16,
2009
Tags carrying, downsizing, cruel, dying, walking, Sports
Transcript
Catbert says, "We can save the most money by downsizing the unhealthiest workers first." The boss says, "How do we know who they are?" Catbert says, "We'll close the parking lot that's nearest the building." Asok says, "Should we help them?" Wally says, "It's too late for broccoli."


