Legal Rights Comic Strips - Page 8

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117 Results for Legal Rights

View 71 - 80 results for legal rights comic strips. Discover the best "Legal Rights" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #walgetco, #practical purposes, #legal laibilities, #wear orange vests, #headwaurters

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"Sixty-percent of our distribution goes through Walgetco." "For all practical purposes, they now own us, except for the legal liabilities." "They'd like us to wear orange vests and bow toward their headquarters." "But no touching?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #negotiations, #legal liabilities, #revenue, #patents, #public credit, #dig swimming pool, #use spoon

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Negotiations Dilbert: so far we've agreed that my company will take all the expenses and legal liabilities. Dilbert: your company will take all of the revenue, patents and public credit. But where it says I"ll dig you a swimming pool with my bare hands I will not do that. You win! You can use a spoon!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #hot mess employee, #magnet for problems, #wally stalks her

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"My life is a rolling disaster." "I'm a magnet for all problems legal, financial, medical and romantic." "Uh-oh... I sense another disaster brewing." wally: "Shes cute. I think I'll stalk her every day."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #attend meeting, #mandatory meeting, #meeting mandatory, #approval, #bending rules, #handed out cash

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"Can I talk to you after the mandatory meeting?" "Whoa! Whoa! I didn't give you approval to attend that meeting." "The meeting is mandatory." "Approval is mandatory too." "Okay, whatever." "May I go to the mandatory meeting?" "All requests must be in writing." "It's mandatory!!! Man-duh-tory!!!" "If people start bending the rules, before long, murder will be legal." "That was the finest mandatory meeting I've ever attended! They handed out cash!" "Shut up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #weapon, #plane, #stand for rights, #Advice, #jail, #complainy

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Dogbert: "You should smuggle a weapon on the plane." "And never, ever return your seat to its upright position! Stand up for your rights!" Dilbert: "I've noticed that all of your advice would put me in jail." Dogbert: "Why must you be so complainy?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lawyer, #400 per hour, #calls dilbert, #legal

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Hello. "This is your lawyer." Lawyer: "Do you mind if I think about you for a few minutes?" "Um... no." "Mmm... $400 an hour." Dilbert: "Wait.. dear lord... noooo!!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #legal department, #products, #highly defective, #user specification, #ate letter, #hugely defective prodcut

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The Boss: "Our legal department advises us to destroy any documents that show we know our products are hugely defective." "CHOMP, CHOMP, CHOMP, CHEW, CHEW, GULP." Alice: "Do you have room in there for the user specifications?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #casino for morons, #concept, #court room, #Dogbert, #gaming commission, #ratbert, #room full dolts, #jury, #legal

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Headline: Gaming Commission. Dogbert and Ratbert are sitting at a table. Dogbert says into a microphone, "My concept is a casino exclusively for morons." Dogbert continues, "Imagine a room full of oblivious dolts, and I'm taking advantage of them for personal gain." A woman on the commission asks, "When would that concept begin?" Dogbert replies, "About a minute ago."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #headhunter, #stock up, #ceo, #random upturns, #make millions, #changing jobs, #legal, #victims

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Dogbert sits at a desk. He says into the phone, "This is Dogbert the Headhunter. I noticed that your company's stock is up today." Dogbert continues, "As CEO, you can take credit for random upturns and make millions by changing jobs." Dogbert continues, "Ha, ha! Yes, it's legal. In fact, if you write a book, your victims will buy it!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bailout loan, #excellent lobbyists, #taxpayers give money, #leagl

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "The government is giving us a bailout loan because we have excellent lobbyists!" The Boss exclaims, "Ha ha! Taxpayers will give us money so we can build overpriced products to sell to taxpayers!" Dilbert turns to The Boss and says, "Remind me again why any of this is legal." The Boss replies, "Wuss."