New York Harbor Comic Strips - Page 8
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1000 Results for New York Harbor
View 71 - 80 results for new york harbor comic strips. Discover the best "New York Harbor" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday April 25,
2019
New Feature Added
Tags business, marketing, office, office workers, time travel
Transcript
the boss: i need you to add a feature to our product because our marketing campaign says we already have it. dilbert: no problem. what's the feature? the boss: time travel. the boss: how long will it take to add that feature? dilbert: if i'm successful, i'll have it done by last week.
Thursday April 18,
2019
Using Git
Tags business, office, office workers, code, developer
Transcript
the boss: i'm hearing that none of your code has been implemented. why are you so unproductive? dilbert: your new lead developer doesn't know how to use git and he keeps overwriting my patches. the boss: i don't know what any of that means. dilbert: well, thank you for stopping by.
Monday April 01,
2019
Nuclear Power Invention
Tags money, office, office workers, nuclear power
Transcript
dilbert: i invented a new type of nuclear power that has zero risk. dilbert: it can be built in one day for less that a thousand dollars and it can power a small city. the boss visually upset and yelling: get that thing out of here! dilbert: i expect it will be hard to sell.
Friday March 22,
2019
Sean From Extreme Marketing
Tags extreme, marketing, sean, brainwashing, technology, unapprove, first
Transcript
Boss: This is Sean from the extreme marketing department. He's here to tell us about our new brainwashing technology. Dilbert: I don't approve of brainwashing. Sean: That's why I'm going to do you first.
Thursday March 21,
2019
Manipulation Via Dopamine
Tags customer, lotalty, science, new, manipulate, addictions, mockery, free will, evil, extreme
Transcript
Boss: We've moved past the old notation of customer loyalty. Now we use science to manipulate dopamine and create addictions that make a mockery of free will. Dilbert: That sounds like the epitome of evil. Boss: We call it "extreme marketing."
Monday March 11,
2019
Marketing Lies
Tags Dilbert, boss, headphones, competition, meeting, marketing, lies
Transcript
Dilbert: Our new headphones product is better than the competition in every way. Boss: Excellent. I'll get marketing involved to tell a bunch of lies about all of that. Dilbert: Why would they need to lie? Boss: They're kind of set in their ways.
Friday March 01,
2019
Being Like A Man
Tags advertising, business, criticism, men and women, relations between the sexes, sales
Transcript
Boss: Our new advertising campaign is "Don't be like men." The ad starts with a montage of bad male behavior, from mansplaining to genocide. Then we show our product. Alice: Did a woman come up with this campaign? Boss: Stop being like a man.
Wednesday February 27,
2019
Loss Of Libido
Sunday February 10,
2019
Tags avoidance, irritation, lunch, office workers, relationships, coworkers
Transcript
Tina: You should meet the new guy in marketing. You two would get along great. I'll set up a lunch. Dilbert: Why? Tina: Because he reminds me of you. Dilbert:That isn't a reason. Tina: Okay, he is free tomorrow for lunch. I'll tell him to meet you in the lobby. Dilbert: I still don't see why the three of us need to go to lunch. Tina: It's just the two of you. I'm busy tomorrow. Man: I hear you're a lot like me. Dilbert: Sadly, yes.
Monday February 04,
2019
Robot Has A Cyborg
Tags insults, Kids, office workers, robot, technology, smartphone
Transcript
Alice: Today I saw a kid on a hoverboard using a smartphone with headphones. It was like a creepy new species that is half-human and half-robot. Robot: That's my son. He's a cyborg. Alice: I'll report myself to human resources.


