Role Model Comic Strips - Page 8
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93 Results for Role Model
View 71 - 80 results for role model comic strips. Discover the best "Role Model" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday March 04,
1995
Tags predicted success, salaries, die in stapler mishap, disagree, precition, Opinion, analysis, science
Transcript
The Boss hands Dilbert a sheet of paper and says, "From now on, salaries will be based on your predicted success, not your past performance." While Dilbert reads the report, the Boss says, "We ran a computer model against your education and DNA information. We predict you'll die in a stapler mishap within a week." Dilbert asks, "What if I disagree with this prediction?" The Boss points at Dilbert and says, "Write up your opinion and staple it to the analysis."
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Monday January 09,
1995
Tags individual cubicles, new system, public schools, hoteling, getting tips, cubicle, computer, chair, roll of note, technology
Transcript
The Boss stands next to an overhead projector. He points to the diagram on the screen and says, "We're taking away your individual cubicles. In the new system, you'll sign up for whatever cube is open that day." Sally and Wally are seated at a conference table. The Boss continues, "It's based on the model of public restrooms. But I call it 'Hoteling' because it increases my chances of getting tips." The Boss approaches Dilbert with a roll of note paper that looks like toilet paper and says, "Each cubicle will have a computer, a chair, and a roll of note paper . . . Take one and pass it around."
Monday December 05,
1994
Tags japanese model, copy best practices, long term investing, boss sings shaft
Transcript
The Boss and Dilbert sit at a table. The Boss says, "We've studied the Japanese model and decided to copy their best practices." Dilbert says, "Long term investing?" The Boss holds up a microphone and yells, "Karaoke!" The Boss stands on the table and sings, "Shaft! Can you dig it?" Dilbert looks at the reader and says, "Thank God we don't have lifetime employment."
Tuesday September 20,
1994
Tags trade show registration, rental beards, not allowed, pipe scented suspenders, portly attendees
Transcript
Trade show registration ClerK : Men without facial hair are not allowed on the exhibition floor. We have rental beards for your convenience. That model comes with pipe-scented suspenders. Its very popular with our portly attendees.
Thursday July 29,
1993
Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, design, volunteers
Transcript
Dilbert and Dogbert look at a model of Dilbert's Bioworld experiment. Dilbert says, "I've completed the design for Bioworld. Have you selected the volunteers?" Dogbert replies, "Yes." Dilbert reads a list and says, "So . . . These are the brave people whose lives will depend on my ability to engineer a balanced ecology." Dilbert says, "Seven car salesmen plus Ratbert . . ." Dogbert says, "Coincidence."
Monday April 19,
1993
Tags Dilbert, the boss, school, Kids, career, engineer, plum, assignment, role model, giggle, children, future
Transcript
Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "The local school wants somebody to talk to the kids about a career as an engineer." The Boss giggles as he says, "I'm giving this plum assignment to you because you're such a good role model." Dilbert says, "It's more sincere sounding when you don't giggle." The Boss says, "Remember, children are our future!"
Friday September 18,
1992
Tags ratbert, Dogbert, talking, lab, cow, egg, industry, discredit, vegetarian, movement, paid, meat, healthy, rat, ironically, chokes, death, carrot
Transcript
Ratbert and Dogbert walk toward each other on the sidewalk. Ratbert says, "Hey, Dogbert, everybody is talking about you at the lab." Dogbert asks, "Really?" Ratbert says, "The 'cow and egg' industry is going to discredit your vegetarian movement. They paid us to prove meat is healthy." Dogbert says, "What's your role?" Ratbert replies, "I play the rat who ironically chokes to death on a carrot during the news conference." Dogbert replies, "Great . . . I'll have to see that on CNN about a jillion times."
Saturday July 25,
1992
Tags Dogbert, model, evaluation, advantage, hideous, service
Transcript
Dogbert says to a woman walking on the sidewalk, "Excuse me, would you like to take advantage of our 'Model Evaluation Service?' Only ten dollars." The woman says, "Me? Gosh, I've never thought of myself that way. Yes, I would love to be evaluated." Dogbert says, "You're hideous . . . That's ten dollars." The woman looks angry.
Thursday July 23,
1992
Tags disguise, squirrels, Dilbert, garbage, model, computer, chaos theory, complex, Alternative, wild guess, spy, squirrel
Transcript
Dilbert says to the garbage man, "I know that my computer model is accurate, but nobody believes me when I predict that squirrels will conquer the earth." The garbage man replies, "Of course, you're aware that according to 'Chaos Theory' any complex iterative model is no better than a wild guess, even if the logic is perfect." Dilbert replies, "You're making that up." The garbage man says, "You caught me; I'm really a giant spy squirrel in disguise."
Tuesday July 21,
1992
Tags computer, squirrels, Dilbert, Dogbert, script, life, super, model, predict, future, nut mines, evil, kidnapped
Transcript
Dilbert hands a book to Dogbert and says, "Here's the full script of the rest of your life. My supercomputer model predicted it." Dogbert reads the script and says, "Well, according to this I'll be kidnapped by evil squirrels and forced to work in their nut mines." Dilbert says, "They get me too." Dogbert says, "I didn't know that evil squirrels had nut mines." Dilbert replies, "It's probably too late to do anything about it."

