Sell T Shirts Comic Strips - Page 8

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181 Results for Sell T Shirts

View 71 - 80 results for sell t shirts comic strips. Discover the best "Sell T Shirts" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 07, 2005's comic on:


Tags #new strategy, #sales stink, #cutting costs, #lose hope, #working great, #higher margins

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The Boss: "Our new strategy is to sell fewer units at higher margins." Dilbert: "Question: How's that different from saying our sales stink, so we're cutting costs?" The Boss: "I call it a strategy so you won't lose hope." Dilbert: "It's working great."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 13, 2004's comic on:


Tags #immoral to sell, #40 thousand, #shard filled donuts, #forcing anyone, #irrestibibly delcious

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Dilbert: "Is it immoral for my company to sell forty-thousand calorie, shard-filled doughnuts?" Dogbert: "You're not forcing anyone to eat them; you're just making them irresistibly delicious." Dilbert: "How's that different?" Dogbert: "Bah!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 11, 2004's comic on:


Tags #conference room, #burn the ruler, #phone, #speaker phone, #bathroom, #cell phones

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The boss: whats that I'm hearing? Is some one on the conference call using the restroom. Had t - oops - me too - I am - Sorry - The Boss: Now tap the speaker phone button to "off"and burn the ruler.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 09, 2004's comic on:


Tags #dress code, #tank tops, #belly shirts, #ruined meeting

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"I've been forced to update the dress code." "Effective today, tank tops and belly shirts are not allowed in the office." "Once again, you've ruined it for everyone."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 22, 2004's comic on:


Tags #girlfriend, #two probelms, #looks, #personlaity, #extreme makeover, #fascinated by new person, #9 good tsories, #social liability, #relationships

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Dilbert: why can't I find a girlfriend? DOgbert: you have two problems: your looks and your personality. Dilbert: Hmm,two itsn't bad. I can fix my looks by getting and extreme makeover. Dogbert: you'll still need to improve M.T.T.S.F. Dilbert: What? Dogbert: mean time to story failure: Its a measure of ho long you can be fascinating to a new person. Dogbert: Ive been counting and you only ave nine good stories after you use them up youre a social liability. Dilbert: I saw a horse kick a woodchuck over a fence. Dogbert: still only nine.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 31, 2004's comic on:


Tags #tech support, #another company, #determine cause

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"This is Dogbert's tech support. Your problem is caused by another company's product or services." "Shouldnt I tell you my problem before you determine the cause?" "Okay, let's pretend that will change my answer."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 22, 2004's comic on:


Tags #taking chance, #indoor plumbing, #teach human habits, #feral emplyee, #trained, #office

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"The feral employee" "I'm taking a chance by hiring you. Dont make me regret it." "Today, one of my seasoned professionals will teach you to use indoor plumbing." "Look! Look at me! The newspaper tucks under the arm!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 18, 2004's comic on:


Tags #berating, #humilation, #importance of work, #making sound rate products, #motivate staff, #no prasie, #no raises, #threats belittling, #trophy wives

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The boss; I need help motivating the staff. Catbert: what have you already tried? The Boss: Threats, belittling, humiliation, empty promises, berating, slogans , posters and bullying. Catbert: hmmm...we can't praise them or they'd as for raises. Catbert: Maybe they can be motivated by the importance of their work. The boss: their work is making second rate products to sell to idiots so our executives can afford trophy wives. Catbert: have you tried yelling until your face turns purple? The boss> make three copies, please!!!! Carol: This is new.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 15, 2004's comic on:


Tags #negotiating, #opening offer, #lots of better offers, #ruining everything

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Negotiating My opening offer is... Dilbert: Thank you, thank you, than you, we accept your offer!! I haven t said an offer. Dilbert: I mean we have lots of other offers that are better. You're ruining everything.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 10, 2004's comic on:


Tags #evil director, #himan resources, #good bye party, #making t shirts, #last of cake

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Catbert: Evil director of human resources Catbert: We're planning a goodbye party for downsizes. Im making T-shirts so its easy to tell who the special guest are. Dilbert: I got the last of the cake. Im special.