Sounds Bad Comic Strips - Page 8

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909 Results for Sounds Bad

View 71 - 80 results for sounds bad comic strips. Discover the best "Sounds Bad" comics from Dilbert.com.

Bad Hair Day

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Bad Hair Day - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #angry, #boss, #employees, #employment, #hair, #hairstyles, #meetings, #threat, #warning

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Boss: Alice, why aren't you at this meeting? Alice: I'm having a bad hair day. Boss: That's no reason to miss a meeting! Alice: You don't understand. It's really, really bad. Boss: Come to the meeting right now, or you're fired! Gurk! Dilbert: That's bad hair. Alice: Can't say I didn't warn him.

Phone Is More Interesting

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Phone Is More Interesting - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cell phone, #criticism, #date, #dinner, #Entertainment, #men and women, #texting, #smartphone

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Tina: I just realized I enjoy using my phone more than I enjoy interacting with you. I mean, this thing is amazing, whereas you haven't found a way to entertain me all night. Dilbert: Maybe I'll grow on you. Tina: "Now he sounds like a tumor. LOl!"

Finding A Scapegoat

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Finding A Scapegoat - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #project, #ceo, #scapegaot, #climate change

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the boss: we'll need a scapegoat to blame for our failure on this project. dilbert: no one will believe it wasn't our fault. the boss: are you kidding? the boss: people will believe anything. the boss: we just have to be the first to frame the situation. dilbert: i suppose we could make our lie sound credible. the boss: that's overkill. dilbert: we don't need to sound credible? the boss: not even a little. the boss is in ceo's office. the boss: our project failed because of climate change. ceo: that sounds right.

Jargon Cancelling Headphones

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Jargon Cancelling Headphones - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #doctor, #doctors' offices, #office, #office workers, #prescription, #headphones, #jargon

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doctor: looks like you have a bad case of jargon poisoning. doctor: i'll write you a prescription for jargon-canceling headphones. they translate jargon words to normal words. office worker: let's stay in our swim lane while the tiger teams get buy-in on the verticals. dilbert hears this with headphones: nothing, nothing, nothing.

Employee Engagement

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Employee Engagement - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #employees, #managers & supervisors, #office, #time, #engagement

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the boss: i'm assigning you to work on our employee engagement initiative. dilbert: does it matter that i think that project sounds like a complete waste of time? the boss: nah.

Seventeen Pieces Of Evidence

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Seventeen Pieces Of Evidence - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #spying, #moron, #elbonian

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the boss: we have seventeen pieces of evidence that you are an elbonian spy. dilbert: no, you have seventeen coincidences and a bad case of confirmation bias. dilbert: how about i prove you're a moron and see how far that gets us?

Bad Denials

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Bad Denials - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #spying, #elbonia

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ceo: have you confirmed that the cyber attacks are coming from elbonia? dilbert: no. ceo: i guess that means you are on their side. dilbert: what? catbert: what proof do you have that dilbert is a spy? ceo: he didn't deny it the way I think he should have.

Bad Planning

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Bad Planning - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #teamwork, #team, #deadline

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ted: i need your help on my project today, or i'll miss my deadline. dilbert: are you trying to turn your lack of planning into my problem? ted: i was hoping you would be a team player. dilbert: i'm holding out for an offer from a better team.

Never Ask About The Sigh

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Never Ask About The Sigh - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #relationships, #serial killer

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carol, asok and dilbert at a conference table. carol: sigh carol: sigh asok: what's wrong? dilbert distressed: gaaaa!!! never ask about the sigh! dilbert: it's a trap to make you listen to a distressing story full of woe. carol: my husband is a hunter and he wants me to learn how to skin and cook his kills. asok: that doesn't sound so bad. dilbert: wait for it. carol: he's a serial killer. dilbert: and there it is.

Wally Slurps

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Wally Slurps - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #complaint, #office, #office workers, #soup

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alice visually distressed and yelling: can you please stop slurping that soup? wally: wow. you complain when i clip my toe-nails, when i make lip-smacking sounds, when i use my speaker-phone, and even when i microwave fish. alice still yelling: doesn't that tell you some things?? wally: yes, it's impossible to please you. slurp.