Told Everyone Comic Strips - Page 8

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

505 Results for Told Everyone

View 71 - 80 results for told everyone comic strips. Discover the best "Told Everyone" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally Has An Idea

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Has An Idea - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Wally, #alice, #Dilbert, #coffee, #work, #criteria, #criticism

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I have an idea on how to fix our process. Alice: I've noticed that all of your ideas make everyone but you work harder. Wally: Apparently, we have different criteria for what makes an idea great.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #deception, #deceit, #contract, #cost, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Here's my invoice for the extras. Dilbert: The invoice we already paid covered everything in the contract. Man: That only covered the costs I quoted with intentional clarity. There are other costs that I might have mentioned in the long and rambling explanation that was intentionally ambiguous. Dilbert: "Might have??" I'm sure you did not. Man: Sounds like your word against mine. Dilbert: And even if you did mention it, you just said it was intentionally ambiguous!!! Man: I don't think you want to tell your boss you're a bad listener. Boss: I thought we already paid this vendor. Dilbert: Did you forget all the extras I told you about?

Everyone Says You Disagree With Everything

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Everyone Says You Disagree With Everything - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accusation, #catch-22, #rebuttal, #defensive

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Everyone says you aren't being a team player because you keep disagreeing with everything. Dilbert: Everyone does not say that, and I don't disagree with everything. Boss: There you go again. You'd be a terrible lawyer. Dilbert: Thank you.

Dilbert Is Misinterpreted

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Is Misinterpreted - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #assume, #assumption, #proof, #obstinacy

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Is it true you are telling everyone the new product road map is stupid? Dilbert: Um... nothing remotely like that has ever happened. Here's an email in which I say how good it is. Alice: You hesitated in your answer. That means you're lying. Dilbert: Read the email!!!

Your Word Against Everyone

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Your Word Against Everyone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accusation, #assume, #assumption, #Opinion

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Everyone says you hate the new product test plan. Dilbert: No, I like it. Boss: Pffft. I don't think all of those people can be wrong about what you think. Dilbert: I'm kind of an expert on what I think. Boss: I guess it's just your word against everyone.

Might Reorganize

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Might Reorganize - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #responsibility, #work ethic, #reorganization, #merger, #laziness

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Are you still considering a reorganization of the department? Boss: Maybe. Wally: Oh, good. I was worried I might be held accountable for my lack of accomplishments. Boss: I might be playing this wrong. Wally: Hey, everyone! We're free!

Feedback From Twitter Guy

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Feedback From Twitter Guy  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #feedback, #criticism, #social media, #twitter, #tweet, #troll, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Do you have any feedback on my idea? Man: Yes. You're weak and stupid, and everyone you love will end up in jail. Dilbert: Do you spend a lot of time on Twitter? Man: Is that a lucky guess or are you spying on me?

Boiling An Ocean

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boiling An Ocean - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #compliment, #backhanded compliment, #insult, #obliviousness

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I told our boss his presentation had a low signal-to-noise ratio and he thought it was a compliment. Wally: I think you just invented my new favorite game. Working for you is like boiling an ocean. Boss: Thank you!

Idea Stealing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Idea Stealing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #idea, #manager, #credit

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: What does everyone think of my idea? Dilbert: I suggested that same idea last week and you said it was terrible. Boss: Your idea was totally different because it involved you getting the credit.

Stress Balls

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Stress Balls - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stress, #frustration, #stress ball

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: I bought stress balls for everyone in the office. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! This ball is too hard to squeeze! It's stressing me out! How is this going to decrease my stress? Catbert: You're thinking of anti-stress balls.