Under Arrest Comic Strips - Page 8

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View 71 - 80 results for under arrest comic strips. Discover the best "Under Arrest" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #gifts under $25, #rules are rules, #worth, #$26

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Dilbert holds a gift. He says to a salesman, "Thank you, but I can only accept gifts under $25. How much is this?" The salesman replies, "$26." Dilbert hands the gift back to the salesman and says, "Well, thanks anyway." The salesman responds, "Rules are rules." Alice is holding the gift. She says, "You're a very nice for a salesperson. But how much is this worth?" The salesman replies slyly, "$26. Why?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dunking tank, #united charity day, #bonk, #lines, #wait in lines

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The Boss is sitting next to Alice and Dilbert. The Boss announces, "I've agreed to be in the dunking tank for this year's United Charity Day." Carol comes up behind them and throws a ball at The Boss, hitting him on the head. "Bonk!!" Alice and Dilbert look down. The Boss has flipped upside down and fallen under the table. Carol says calmly, "I don't like lines."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #can't sleep, #tell story, #pointy haired monster, #cry, #dilbert bedtime story, #tells life story, #rat crys

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Dilbert is sitting on his couch in his bathrobe. His pet rat approaches on the arm rest and says, "I can't sleep. Would you tell me a story." The rat is cuddled under a blanket on the couch. Dilbert begins his story: "Once upon a time there was a pointy-haired monster." He continues, "He promised riches to the villagers if they could achieve his random objectives." The rat begins to get drowsy. Dilbert continues his story: "The villagers worked long hours but they were happy and optimistic." Dilbert continues, "Suddenly the evil monster cut their funding and hired the village idiot to be project manager." Dilbert continues, "And that is how the villagers got trapped in meetings for all eternity. The end." The rat opens its eyes wide in horror. The rat cries, "Waaa!! Waaa!! Waaa!!" Dilbert says to Dogbert, "Rats cry when they hear about my life." Dogbert responds, "It never pays to listen."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rash of thefts, #acts suspicious, #cut meeting, #posters, #break room, #police, #arrest, #man screams, #legal

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The Boss says to Wally and Dilbert, "We've had a rash of thefts. Be on the lookout for anyone who acts suspicious." Wally and Dilbert turn and face a coworker who says, "Can we cut this meeting short? The posters in the break room got me all motivated!" Dilbert and Wally watch as the coworker is escorted out of the meeting by the police. He screams, "Then why are they there?!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #trust, #integrity, #teamwork, #warm glow, #unconditional love, #heating vent, #under vent

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The boss, at a confence table, says, "Our company values are trust, integrity and teamwork." Wally says, "For the first time in my life I feel the warm glow of unconditional love!" Dilbert, pointing up, says, "You're under a heating vent." Wally says, "Oh...well, that's good too."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #high school reunion, #whos incredible, #point to name, #gullible people

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Dilbert, holding a book, says to Dogbert, "I'm bringing my copy of 'Who's Incredible' to my high school reunion." Flipping through the pages of the book, Dilbert says to Dogbert, "If anyone asks how I'm doing, I'll casually open the book and point to my name." At his high school reunion, Dilbert talks to a man and woman. Dilbert has his copy of 'Who's Incredible' under his arm. The man says, "I got rich selling a book called "Who's Incredible' to gullible people."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #power utility company, #director marketing, #increase revenue, #herbivore

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Dogbert says to a dragon, "Bob, I'm starting a power utility company." Dogbert says to the dragon, "You'll be my Director of Marketing. Your job is to increase revenue." A frightened-looking boy is lying in bed with the covers pulled up to his nose. A lighted lamp is at his bedside. The dragon's tail is sticking out from under the bed and the dragon says, "Normally I'm an herbivore, Billy, but when the lights go off..."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #germs, #safe from germs, #alice, #sneeze, #blows up, #germ safety device

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An under-the-weather Alice sits at her computer. Wally is wearing a protective head covering that looks like a large gas mask. Wally says, "I'm safe from your germs, Alice. You can sneeze all you want." Alice pulls the cap off the hose to Wally's gas mask as she begins to sneeze with a large sound of, "Aah..." Alice completes her sneeze into the hose of Wally's gas mask. Wally's head covering blows up like a huge balloon.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #calling in sick, #honesty, #monday, #puked, #puked up organs, #questioned, #suspicious, #vomit, #glah!, #optional guts

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An under-the-weather Alice sits angrily as The Boss says, "I'm a bit suspicious about you calling in sick yesterday on a Monday, Alice." The Boss looks startled as Alice exclaims, "Glah!" and her internal organs fly out of her mouth. Alice says to Dilbert, "Luckily I had lots of optional guts."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #positive reinforcement, #addicted, #delivarables, #praised

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Alice thinks to herself, "I'm addicted to positive reinforcement." Alice continues thinking, "I need some deliverables so I can be praised again." Dilbert watches as Alice reaches for the overhead projector from under the table.