Alleged Focus Group Comic Strips - Page 8

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

211 Results for Alleged Focus Group

View 71 - 80 results for alleged focus group comic strips. Discover the best "Alleged Focus Group" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meetings, #standards meeting., #represent interests, #create standards, #mutually exclusive prefrences, #laughs

View Transcript

Transcript

Standards Meeting. Dogbert: Each of you has been chosen to represent the interests of your respective companies. As you know, the best way to create standards is to mash together a bunch of mutually exclusive preferences. I hope I'm not the only one who joined this group just for the laughs.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #editors, #document, #bad edits, #wrong religion, #fool

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: I made some edits to your document. Dilbert: These edits are so bad that my only choices are to send it out and make a fool of myself or insult your alleged intelligence. Coworker: Please let it be the first choice. Dilbert: I hope you didn't pick the wrong religion too.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #crimes, #watch, #neighborhood, #leader

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert and Dilbert stand in the yard. Dilbert, who is wearing a sash and carrying a flashlight, asks, "Are you sure you don't want to join the neighborhood watch group?" Dogbert says, "This is ridiculous. You all know that every single crime in this neighborhood was committed by one guy: Bad Ed." Dilbert says, "We can't actually prove that." Dogbert says, "I'm just saying maybe you shouldn't have elected him group leader."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #economy, #mud, #planning, #pigs, #communism, #elbonia, #Political, #capitalism

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to a group of Elbonians, "The basic problem with your economy is that the only product you make is mud . . ." An Elbonian asks, "So?" Dilbert says, "Nobody needs mud. Who the heck is in charge of planning this economy, anyway?" The pig smiles.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #elbonian, #capitalism, #incentive, #twelve hourse, #rich, #tv shows, #millionaire's, #life

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to a group of Elbonians, "The first thing you Elbonians must understand about capitalism is the incentive system." Dilbert continues, "If you're willing to work twelve hours a day, eventually the guy who owns your factory will get rich." An Elbonian asks another, "Am I missing something here?" Dilbert continues, "Then you guys get to watch great tv shows based on the millionaire's life!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #judicial proceedings, #Dilbert, #doubted, #clients, #innocence, #defense, #jury, #client, #lawyer, #civic, #duty, #Dogbert

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Jury selection." A lawyer says, "My client is accused of killing twelve people just like you folks." The attorney continues, "The alleged victims were all part of a previous jury who doubted my client's innocence." The jury members look horrified. The lawyer says, "This jury is acceptable to the defense."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #pride, #museum, #strange, #amazing, #cauliflower, #breakfast, #marylin, #dan quayle

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert leads a tour group. He says, "This next exhibit is the pride of 'Dogbert's Museum of the Strange and Amazing.'" A man holds his child up to see an exhibit that is labeled "Dan Quayle's Brain." The man says, "It looks like a little piece of cauliflower." The child eats the cauliflower and his father says, "Sorry, we should have stopped for breakfast . . ." Dogbert says, "What am I going to tell Marilyn?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #japan, #favoite, #animals, #remember, #calisthenics, #shark

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss approaches Wally and Dilbert carrying costumes. The Boss says, "On my recent business trip to Japan, I learned that Japanese workers dress as their favorite animals to boost productivity." Wally wears a beaver costume and Dilbert wears a dolphin costume. In Japan, a group of workers laugh as one man says, "Ooh-ooh . . . And remember the time we told them we all do calisthenics?!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #customers, #consultant, #tom peters, #follows, #around, #passionate, #criticism, #splitter, #customer

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "We've got to focus more on the needs of our customers." The Boss points to a man standing next to him and says, "I've hired famous business consultant Tom Peters to follow you around and make passionate criticism." Tom stands behind Dilbert while he works. Tom waves his arms as he asks, "Is this quality? Are you truly focused on the customer?" Dilbert thinks, "Great . . . He's a spitter."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #bright, #fellow, #mensa, #genuis, #iq, #local, #chapter, #smart, #intelligence, #practical, #application

View Transcript

Transcript

A man with a large head says to Dilbert, "You seem like a bright fellow; have you considered joining Mensa?" Dilbert asks, "Is that the group with genius IQs?" The man replies, "Precisely correct. I'm president of the local chapter." Dilbert asks, "If we're so smart, why do we work here?" The man replies, "Intelligence has much less practical application than you'd think."