Company's Core Values Comic Strips - Page 8
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98 Results for Company's Core Values
View 71 - 80 results for company's core values comic strips. Discover the best "Company's Core Values" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday May 17,
2007
Monday May 28,
2007
Monday July 02,
2007
Tags #strategic asset, #market share, #fire yourself, #accountabilty
Transcript
The Boss: Human resources is a company's most important strategic asset. "That means it's your fault we're losing market share. Maybe you should fire yourself." "Strategic assets don't like accountability."
Tuesday February 06,
2007
Tags #boss gives pen, #20 years at job, #could be old
Transcript
The Boss: Congratulations on 20 years of service. Here's a pen with the company's logo. "I have one just like it. At least I think this one is mine. I might have gotten them mixed up." "Which one looks like it spent the least time in my ear?"
Tuesday November 06,
2012
Tags #business failures/bankruptcies, #honesty, #slide toward irrelevance, #redesign logo, #produce tablet computer, #ugly truth, #personified
Transcript
Man: There's nothing you can do about your company's long slide toward irrelevance. But if you redesign your logo and produce a tablet computer that no one buys, at least it will look like you're trying. CEO: Who are you? Man: I'm the ugly truth. Most people just ignore me.
Friday December 28,
2012
Tags #anger, #Games, #aggressive recently, #testosterone, #trivia contest, #useless worm
Transcript
Dilbert: I've been aggressive recently. Wally: I haven't noticed. Dilbert: I think my testosterone is all jacked up because I won the company's online trivia contest. Not get out of my way, useless worm. Wally: Okay, I'm starting to see it.
Thursday January 03,
2008
Tags #traffic, #work, #co worker, #shopping, #week, #attractive nuisance
Transcript
secretary: Wally, did you finish the traffic estimates?" Wally: I didn't have time. I spent all week shopping on the company's online supply ordering site. Hey, you can't blame the guy who just uses the attractive nuisance.
Wednesday June 11,
2008
Tags #abe lincoln, #avoid comparisons, #fords theater, #media trainer, #sandwhich, #company future
Transcript
Dogbert the Media Trainer Dogbert: Carefully choose your words when talking about the company's future. For example, avoid comparisons to Abe Lincoln at Ford's Theatre, 'Circling the drain,' and anything involving flies."And never, ever refer to the company as any kind of sandwich you wouldn't want to eat." CEO: That's my favorite one!"
Monday August 25,
2008
Tags #company secrets, #Dilbert, #elbonia, #laptop, #mittens, #spies stole
Transcript
Elbonia An Elbonian says, "Our spies stole this laptop from an employee named Dilbert." The Elbonian says, "Ha ha! We will find his company's secrets and use them!" Another Elbonian says, "heh-heh." Six months later An Elbonian says, "Do you remember mittens? I loved having mittens." The other Elbonian says, "Shut up!!"
Tuesday September 01,
2009
Tags #meeting, #elbonia, #angry, #threatening, #kung fu, #frustration, #stuck, #business
Transcript
Industry Standards Meeting in Elbonia Dilbert says, "Let's adopt my company's specs as the industry standard." Man says, "Your specifications are weak, and so is your kung fu." From that day on, all standards meetings were held in the mud of Elbonia. Man says, "Can't...Kick! Stupid...mud!"