Doesn't Work Anyway Comic Strips - Page 8

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View 71 - 80 results for doesn't work anyway comic strips. Discover the best "Doesn't Work Anyway" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dilbert Doesn't Need Vacations

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Dilbert Doesn't Need Vacations - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 2016's comic on:


Tags #vacation, #work ethic, #workload, #time off

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Boss: Company policy says you have to take a vacation. Dilbert: I don't want one. I would be bored for a week and come back to all the work that piled up while I was gone. Boss: Nothing about you is normal. Dilbert: Thank you.

Permission To Work Smarter

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Permission To Work Smarter - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 13, 2016's comic on:


Tags #sayings, #motivation, #Advice, #laziness, #work ethic

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Wally: Do I have your permission to work smarter and not harder? Boss: Um... sure. That sounds like a good thing to do. But how would I know you were working? Wally: I don't even know if I'm working right now.

Only Work If You'd Rather Do Something Else

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Only Work If You'd Rather Do Something Else - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 14, 2016's comic on:


Tags #fulfillment, #happiness, #satisfaction, #work ethic, #motivation, #psychology

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Boss: Remember, it's only work if you'd rather be doing something else! Tina: I would rather do anything else. Boss: Oh. In that case, you're trapped in a nightmare that never ends. Tina: I have a lot riding on the afterlife.

Boss Wants Alice To Be His Work Wife

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Boss Wants Alice To Be His Work Wife - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 13, 2016's comic on:


Tags #wife, #spouse, #work, #creep, #relationships, #repulsive

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Boss: I decided to call you my work-wife. Alice: Gurk. I"m creeped out! I'm creeped out! I'm creeped out! Boss: Just like at home. Alice: I need a shower.

Tina Agrees To Be Work Wife

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Tina Agrees To Be Work Wife - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Tags #spouse, #wife, #insult, #mean, #game, #obliviousness, #relationships

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Boss: Alice doesn't want to be my work-wife. How about you? Tina; As your work-wife, would I be able to jokingly insult you in front of the others? Boss: Sure, ha ha! Tina: Okay, I'm in. Now run along, you ignorant sack of wet fertilizer. Boss: This is fun!

Alice Takes On More Work

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Alice Takes On More Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 27, 2016's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #workload, #philosophy, #semantics

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Alice: Why do I keep taking on more work while you do noting? Wally: That's because you optimize for productivity, while I optimize for my happiness. Alice: That makes you a freeloader. Wally: I prefer the label "happy winner."

Wally's Work Life Balance

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Wally's Work Life Balance - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 14, 2016's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #excuse

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Wally: I can't do your urgent task because I'm on deadline for my boss. I can't meet your deadline because I have an urgent task from a co-worker. I finally figured out the whole "work-life balance" thing.

The Illusion Of Work

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The Illusion Of Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 18, 2017's comic on:


Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #deception

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Wally: It's easier to create the illusion of work than it is to do actual work. That's why I carry this red folder with me wherever I go. Man: Can you attend a design meeting at two? Wally: Ooh... I wish I could, but I'm behind on the red file.

Wally's Red File Gets Him Out Of Work

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Wally's Red File Gets Him Out Of Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 19, 2017's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #ruse, #work ethic, #deception, #excuse

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Wally: I'd love to help you, but I'm busy working on the red file. Woman: Is the red file a real thing or just a thing you say to get out of work? Wally: It's all the same on your end.

Taking Pride In Work

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Taking Pride In Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 24, 2017's comic on:


Tags #motivation, #pep talk, #logic, #pride, #suffering, #work ethic

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Boss: Wally, I"m starting to think you don't take pride in your work. Wally: That would be like taking pride in being the victim of a crime. Catbert: How'd the pep talk go? Boss: He made some good points.