Don't Like Boss Comic Strips - Page 8

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1000 Results for Don't Like Boss

View 71 - 80 results for don't like boss comic strips. Discover the best "Don't Like Boss" comics from Dilbert.com.

Alice And Blockchain

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 Alice And Blockchain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #technology, #project, #learn, #skills

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alice: i'd like to help on the blockchain project to build my skills in that area. boss: i don't like it when people learn new things. alice: i don't know what to say to that. boss: oh, good. it worked.

Boss Doesn't Understand

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  Boss Doesn't Understand - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #server, #migration, #difficult, #understand, #question, #face maks

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boss: can you finish the server migration by monday? dilbert: no way. boss: how hard can it be? dilbert: you only say that about things you don't understand. boss: i ask that question every day. dilberty: yup.

Quotes Out Of Context

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Quotes Out Of Context  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger, #business, #context, #dumb, #employment, #face mask, #malice, #managers & supervisors, #out of context, #project, #quote, #writing

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co-worker: i don't like what you wrote about my project, so i took one of your quotes out of context, to make you look dumb, and sent it to your boss. dilbert: that won't work, because once i explain the proper context, he will see there is nothing to it. later that day. dilbert: ...so, as you can see, that quote was out of context. boss yelling: liar!!!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #executives, #interviews, #ceo's interview series, #company priftable, #credit, #overpaid and useless, #dumb employees, #highest bidder, #blackmail, #interview

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Dogbert says, "I don't like people." Dogbert says, "What makes your company so profitable?" CEO says, "I give all of the credit to our fine employees." Dogbert says, "Is that another way of saying you're overpaid and useless?" CEO says, "Um... no. I'm their leader. I set the direction." Dogbert says, "Because the employees are too dumb to set their own direction?" CEO says, "No! They're smart!" Dogbert says, "But not as smart as you?" CEO says, "Who's going to see this?" Dogbert says, "No one, assuming you're the highest bidder." Dogbert's CEO Interview Series

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #witch, #practicing, #awful, #lawn ornaments, #tacky, #lawn

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Dilbert sits at a restaurant table with a woman. The woman says, "Thanks for asking me out. Most guys get scared when they find out I'm a practicing witch." The woman continues, "Then they say something I don't like and I end up turning them into lawn ornaments." Dilbert replies, "That's awful!" The woman says, "Tell me about it . . . you can't believe how tacky my lawn is now."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #elbonia, #reclassified, #third-world, #second-world, #plenty, #elbonians, #world relations

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Dilbert reads the newspaper and says, "The tiny nation of Elbonia has been reclassified from a third-world country to a second-world country." Dogbert asks, "Second?" Dilbert explains, "That means they have plenty to eat, but they don't like it." In Elbonia, an Elbonian mother puts a tray of food on the table. Her child says, "Airline food, again?!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #dog, #stares, #plotting, #something, #instinct, #people's, #noses, #strong

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Dilbert sits in his chair thinking, "I hate it when my dog just stares at me." Dilbert thinks, "Is he plotting? Does hoe know something I don't? What is it?" Dogbert looks at Dilbert through a pair of binoculars. Dogbert thinks, "Dogs don't like to talk about it, but the instinct to look up people's noses is very strong."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #coffee, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #drinking, #dependent, #chemicals, #slow, #work, #monday, #thursday

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I quit drinking coffee. I don't like to be dependent on chemicals." Dogbert asks, "How's it feel?" Dilbert replies, "I felt a little slow getting ready for work, but you have to expect that on a Monday." Dogbert says, "It's Thursday."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #ratbert, #elbonia, #elbonian man, #body guard

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Dilbert packs his suitcase. Ratbert says, "I'll go with you on your trip to Elbonia. I can be your bodyguard." Dilbert replies, "It's not a good place for a rat. The mud is quite . . ." Ratbert yells, "You think I'm not tough enough? I'll show you!!" In Elbonia, an Elbonian points at a bump in the mud next to Dilbert and asks, "And THAT'S your bodyguard?" Ratbert says from under the mud, "I don't like the tone of your voice."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #trying to please, #fool, #better please, #crush you, #selfish dogbert, #justa thought, #others, #threatened

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Dilbert: "I can't live my life trying to please others." Dogbert: "I think I can speak for all others when I say, 'Fool! You'd better please us or we'll crush you!'" Dilbert: "It was just a thought." Dogbert: "We 'others' don't like to be threatened."