Dumb Name Comic Strips - Page 8

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454 Results for Dumb Name

View 71 - 80 results for dumb name comic strips. Discover the best "Dumb Name" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 12, 2002's comic on:


Tags #efficient, #glass walled room, #name of case, #too unattractive, #tribunal of admin. assistants, #verdict, #humanity

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Carol says, "The tribunal of Admin Assistants will hear the case of..." Carol continues, "The man who is too unattractive to use the glass-walled conference room versus humanity." Dilbert exclaims, "You put the verdict in the name of the case!" Carol replies, "We're efficient."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 30, 2002's comic on:


Tags #client, #to dumb, #embezzle, #dogbert the lawyer, #calling jury dumb

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Dilbert says to a jury, "I will prove that my client is too dumb to embezzle." Dogbert continues, "Or, failing in that, I'll prove that you're too dumb to know he did it." The judge starts, "Mister Dogbert..." Dogbert interrupts, "Don't get me started about you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 17, 2002's comic on:


Tags #work to death, #six months, #mentally incompetent, #remove name, #beneficiaries

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Headline: Estate Planning. Dilbert is in a lawyer's office. He says to the lawyer, "I expect to work myself to death in six months, so I need a will." The lawyer asks, "Are you mentally incompetent?" Dilbert responds, "I don't think so." The lawyer says, "Okay then, I'll remove my name from the list of beneficiaries."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 24, 2003's comic on:


Tags #coffee rehadb, #rip beard, #death, #state name, #coffee addicting withdrawl, #sleeping, #mean, #nasty, #cutting, #violent, #falls asleep, #medical

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Headline: Coffee Rehab. A man stands at a podium and says, "State your name and how long you've been without coffee." The audience is asleep except for one angry patient who says, "I am going to rip off your little beard and beat you to death with it." The man at the podium thinks to himself, "Don't panic... wait... wait...." The angry patient continues, "And then I'll... um... zzzzzzz, zzzzz, zzz."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 20, 2003's comic on:


Tags #hire emplyees, #qaulified, #hore dumb people, #motivation

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Catbert stands on The Boss' desk and says, "We can't afford to hire qualified employees." Catbert continues, "My plan is to hire dumb people and be angry at them." Catbert replies, "I forget - what's the word for pretending that people can change their basic nature?" The Boss replies, "Motivation?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 16, 2003's comic on:


Tags #business reporter, #wall times post gazette, #new product line, #nick name for ceo

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Dilbert answers his work phone, "Hi, this is Dilbert." The voice on the other end says, "Hi, I'm a business reporter for the Wall Times Post Gazette." The reporter says, "I'm doing a story about how dumb.. I mean dynamic... your new product line is." Dilbert comes home and tells Dogbert, "Then he promised not to print the amusing nickname I have for our CEO." Dogbert responds, "You are so dynamic."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 26, 2004's comic on:


Tags #illusions of progress, #companys name, #hi tech sounding, #onomatopeoia, #duhflushtech, #lack of awareness

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Dogbert: "You need to change the company's name to create the illusion of progress." "The name should be hi-tech sounding with a hint of onomatopoeia that signals your total lack of awareness." "Maybe something like 'Duhflushtech, inc.'" "I like it!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 02, 2004's comic on:


Tags #need name, #company, #disguise, #treachery, #catchy, #krap2idiots, #business

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Dogbert: "I need a name for my company, then I can film the infomercial." Dilbert: "I assume you want a name that will help disguise your treachery." "Not so much." TV: "And now a word from the CEO of Krap2idiots." Dilbert: "Catchy." "Shhh..."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 21, 1999's comic on:


Tags #big dumb guy, #disagree, #lazy, #habitual liar, #excellent track record, #excellent work

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The Boss brings a Big Dumb Guy to Alice's desk. He says, "Alice, I'd like you to work with this big dumb guy." The Boss continues, "He doesn't know he's dumb. So he'll tell people you're dumb if you ever disagree." The Boss: "He's also lazy and a habitual liar." Alice shouts, "Then why do you let him work here?!" The Boss explains, "He has an excellent track record. No one knows why." In front of the Boss and Alice, the Big Dumb Guy bends over and picks up the document that Alice was working on from her desk. Big Dumb Guy shows Alice's document to the Boss. Big Dumb Guy says, "Look what I just did." The Boss responds, "Excellent work." Alice is flabbergasted. The Boss tries to console Alice, who is furious, with "Remember Alice, you're never too old to learn."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 17, 1999's comic on:


Tags #dumb boss, #tape measure, #postage on email, #my boss is so dumb

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Ted, Dilbert and Carol sit at a conference table. Ted says, "My boss is so dumb, He brought a tape measure to a distance learning class." Everyone laughs, "HA HA HA HA!" Carol says, "My boss is so dumb..." Carol says, "He puts postage stamps on his e-mail. Now he can't see his pc screen." Everyone laughs, "HA HA HA HA!" Ted says to Dilbert, "How about you, Dilbert? Do you have any dumb boss jokes?" The Boss enters the conference room. The Boss says, "Dilbert, my pc is warm. I think our fire wall is acting up." Ted pats Dilbert on the back and says, "We're sorry." Carol says, "We didn't know."