Eat A Lot Comic Strips - Page 8

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397 Results for Eat A Lot

View 71 - 80 results for eat a lot comic strips. Discover the best "Eat A Lot" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #gullible world, #magazine, #cover story, #shed pounds, #yell at children, #eat your way, #be a better parent

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My new magazine is called 'Gullible World'. "This month's cover story is 'Shed Pounds by Yelling at Your Children'." "Next month will be 'Eat Your Way to Being a Better Parent'."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #the contractor, #dream, #regular employee, #eat candy, #poop emeralds

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The Contractor "My dream is to one day become a regular employee." "My dream is to eat candy and poop emeralds." "The difference is that I'm halfway successful."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #laptop computer, #order for me, #tech seminar, #hawaii, #sign up, #four day weekend, #eat catepillar, #recognize pattern, #copies everything, #boss

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Susan is standing in front of the boss who is sittind at his desk. Susan says: "May I get a laptop computer?" The boss answers: "No, but you can order one for me." Dilbert hands a sheet of paper to the boss and says: "May I go to this technical seminar in Hawaii? The boss answers: "No, but you can sign me up for it." Alice shows the boss a calendar and says: "May I take this Friday off so I have a four day weekend?" The boss answers: "No, but you can sit in for me while I take that Friday off." Wally says to the boss:"May I eat this caterpillar?" The boss answers: "Give me that." The boss is sitting at his desk all by himself and thinks: " I hope they never recognize the pattern." while he is chewing the caterpillar.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #beef, #cake, #diet, #drink kool aid, #eat it too, #just derts, #meat and potatoes, #pie hole, #vendores, #play on words, #food metphors, #health

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The boss: Our meat and potatoes is knowing how to sandwich in our product without causing the other vendors to beef. "We'll get our just desserts when they drink the Kool-Aid. Then we can have our cake and eat it too." Alice: "Are you on a diet?" " The boss: Shut your pie hole."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting right now, #lunch time, #12 hours, #misery, #envy, #dead don't eat lucnch

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The Boss: Can you come to a meeting right now? Dilbert: No, it's almost lunch time. If I miss lunch, my day will be 12 hours of uninterrupted misery. I will envy the dead. The Boss: That's stupid. The dead don't eat lunch either.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #high altitude view, #bunch of termites, #termites hate each other, #eat same log

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The Boss says, "I don't need to know the details. Just give me the high altitude view." Dilbert says, "From a high altitude we're all a bunch of termites trying to eat the same log." The Boss says, "Maybe drill down a little more." Dilbert says, "The termites hate each other."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #company lawyer, #simple agreement, #impenetrable gibberish, #sour taste, #choke my suspenders, #exercise, #eat right, #finish, #health

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Company Lawyer Dilbert says, "Can you turn a simple agreement into impenetrable gibberish?" The lawyer says, "Absolutely. I can also leave a sour taste in everyone's mouth and make you want to choke me with my suspenders." The lawyer says, "If you exercise and eat right, you might still be alive when I finish it." Dilbert says, "Good enough."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #eat quieter, #asthmatic rhinoceros, #rampaging a cracker festival, #prepare sluprer

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Tina says, "Wally, can you eat quieter?" Crunch crunch mmmph crunch gulp Tina says, "you sound like an asthmatic rhinoceros rampaging a cracker festival." Mmmph erm crunch crunch Tina says, "GAAA!!! Not the beverage!" Wally says, "Prepare slurper! Boop!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dogcart the ceo, #investors, #bought helicopter, #birds off building, #parking lot, #beaks and feathers

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Dogbert the CEO The Boss says, "Our investors are not happy that you bought a helicopter." The Boss says, "Or that you only use it to keep birds off the building." The Boss says, "Or that the parking lot is filling up with beaks and feathers." Dogbert says, "I can't please everyone."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #philanthropist, #eat for one day, #opulent life, #super models, #stop giving, #inspire, #try harder

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Dogbert the Philanthropist Dogbert says, "If I give a man a fish, he will eat for one day." Dogbert says, "But if I inspire him by my opulent lifestyle and my squiring of supermodels, he might try harder." Dilbert says, "You can't stop giving." Dogbert says, "It's like a curse."