Find Humor Comic Strips - Page 8
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399 Results for Find Humor
View 71 - 80 results for find humor comic strips. Discover the best "Find Humor" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday September 19,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #mother nature, #plastic, #environmentalism, #planet
Transcript
Mother Nature: Okay, everybody off! Let's go, get off!! Dilbert: ? Mother nature? Mother Nature: Move along now. Find another planet. Dilbert: But... But... Mother Nature: Shoo! Come back when all the plastic is gone.
Tuesday October 23,
1990
Tags #Dilbert, #jury, #judicial system, #defense, #attorney, #obnoxious, #death, #fetching, #black, #muumuu, #honor
Transcript
The judge asks, "Has the jury reached a verdict?" Dogbert stands and replies, "Yes, your honor. We find the defense attorney poorly dressed and obnoxious. We sentence him to death." The judge says, "I don't think you can do that." Dogbert continues, "Furthermore, we find that your honor looks fetching in a black muumuu."
Wednesday January 16,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #museum, #tazmanian, #woogat, #silk, #cheap, #polyester, #shirts, #wear, #gift, #shop
Transcript
Dogbert leads a man and a woman through the museum. Dogbert says, "'Dogbert's Museum of the Strange and Amazing' is the only place you can find . . ." Dogbert continues, ". . . A shirt woven entirely from a single thread of Tazmanian woogat silk." The man says, "It looks like the cheap polyester shirts that I wear." Dogbert says, "In that case, this is the gift shop."
Monday February 25,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #gravity, #invention, #half, #net, #land, #money, #jump, #ledge, #gross
Transcript
Dilbert reads a document and says, "Dogbert, I sold the rights to my anti-gravity invention. I get to keep half of the 'net.'" Dilbert says, "I wonder what 'net' means." Dogbert responds, "Net is what you land in after you find out you get no money and jump off a ledge." Dilbert asks, "What if there is no net?" Dogbert replies, "It's gross."
Monday March 25,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #puppies, #nose, #ceramic, #fits, #motto, #fill
Transcript
Dilbert approaches a man standing next to a cart with a sign that says, "Nose Puppies $1.00." The man cries, "Nose puppies! Get your nose puppies!" Dilbert asks, "What's a nose puppy?" The man answers, "It's a little ceramic puppy that fits in your nose." The man continues, "'Find a need and fill it,' is my motto."
Thursday April 04,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #andy the android, #humans, #sleep, #eat, #don't, #die, #existential, #crisis
Transcript
Andy: Androids want to be like humans. Tell me what humans do. Dilbert: Mostly, they eat, sleep, and hope they don't die. Andy: That's it? Dilbert: Unless they find religion... Then they eat, sleep, and look forward to dying.
Wednesday April 24,
1991
Tags #news, #news reporter, #mysterious, #circles, #aliens, #crop circles, #crushed, #wheat, #starts, #one, #point, #outward, #formed, #around
Transcript
A television reporter holds a microphone and says, "I'm standing at the Wickford wheat fields outside of London, the site of mysterious giant circles, possibly caused by aliens." The reporter asks a man with a backpack, "How do you find these circles of crushed wheat?" The man answers, "My team of experts starts at one point and searches outward until . . ." The man looks behind him where a circle of people tramples the wheat field. He cries, "Good Lord! Another circle has formed around us!!"
Wednesday June 26,
1991
Tags #top, #executive, #lunch, #workers, #think, #speak, #freely, #lacking, #leadership, #initiative, #opinions, #risks, #fling, #potato, #au gratin
Transcript
Dilbert and an executive sit at a table eating lunch. The executive says, "I have these lunches to find out what the workers are thinking. You may speak freely." Dilbert says, "Okay . . . It seems like the company is lacking leadership and direction. The executives squelch all initiative by punishing those who take risks and voice opinions." The executive puts some food on his fork and says, "You leave me little choice but to fling this au gratin potato at your forehead."
Friday August 02,
1991
Tags #Dilbert, #eliminating, #simple, #caused, #people, #invisible, #juan, #cindy, #kill, #them, #motivational, #speaking
Transcript
Dogbert stands on a stage holding a microphone. He says to the audience, "The Dogbert method of eliminating guilt is quite simple." Dogbert continues, "All of your problems are caused by invisible people named Juan and Cindy." Dogbert continues, "All you have to do is find them and kill them."
Tuesday August 06,
1991
Tags #pregnancy & child birth, #the boss, #alice, #xerox, #birth, #job, #special, #treatment
Transcript
The Boss sits at his desk and says, "Alice, I noticed you gave birth by the Xerox machine this morning . . ." The Boss continues, "We don't have a maternity leave policy here, but if you need some time, I'm sure we can find somebody less fertile to fill your job." Alice replies, "Thank you, sir, but I don't expect any special treatment." Alice is breast feeding a baby under her shirt.