Foot Rest Comic Strips - Page 8

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

147 Results for Foot Rest

View 71 - 80 results for foot rest comic strips. Discover the best "Foot Rest" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 05, 2001's comic on:


Tags #selfish, #dimwitted, #six sigma consulatant, #bog down meetings, #process, #can't hurt anything

View Transcript

Transcript

Headline: Six Sigma Consultant. Dogbert is standing in front of a room. He says, "All of you are selfish and dimwitted but don't worry." Dogbert continues, "I'll teach you a process that will bog you down in meetings so you can't hurt anything." Asok panics and exclaims, "I can't move my arms!" The rest of the class is asleep.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 20, 2000's comic on:


Tags #division, #unusually profictable, #targets impossibly high, #profit target, #sabotage profits, #stop customers, #wasteful spending, #leadership training, #class, #stick out coffee mug

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert, the Boss, and Wally are at a meeting. The Boss says: "Our division is unusually profitable this year." He turns to Dilbert: "That means our targets for next year will be set impossibly high." He turns to Wally: "Our only hope of reaching our profit target next year..." He continues: "...is to sabotage profits for the rest of this year." He explains further: "It's too late to stop customers from buying our products." He continues: "So we'll focus on increasing wasteful spending." The Boss puts his hand on Wally's shoulder and tells him: "Wally, I'm sending you to a leadership training class." After the meeting, Wally sticks out his coffee mug and asks Dilbert, "Did you ever stick out your coffee mug and just follow where it took you?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 12, 2002's comic on:


Tags #moneybags magazine, #ask employees, #claims are true, #cover story

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert is sitting at a desk. Bob the Dinosaur approaches and says, "The reporter from Moneybags Magazine is here." Dogbert responds, "Send him in." The reporter sits across from Dogbert. Dogbert asks, "Are you planning to ask my employees if my claims are true?" The reporter replies, "Nah, too lazy." Dogbert says, "I credit my success to the foot massages I personally give to each employee." The reporter takes notes and thinks to himself, "Cover story!"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 15, 2003's comic on:


Tags #used coffee sirrer, #watsebacket, #not maid, #laziness

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: "Hey! You left a used coffee stirrer on the counter!!!" Wally: "The wastebasket was one foot away! I am an associate not your maid!!!" "Behold the power of laziness." Carol: "So, I'll throw it away for you THIS TIME."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 28, 2003's comic on:


Tags #edited document, #calirty, #sent out, #amazing, #accuracy and relevance, #spend career fixing

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I edited your document for clarity and sent it out. Dilbert: wow. Its amazing how clear it is when you take out all of the accuracy and relevance. I stopped listening after wow I'll get busy spending the rest of my career fixing this.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 10, 2004's comic on:


Tags #portotype, #wireless hassock - buddy, #gps naviagtion, #stalk owners, #stalk, #powerpoint presentations

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I finished the prototype for the wireless hassock-buddy. It uses GPS navigation to stalk its owner and demand that he rest his feet. Today I learned the words "stalk" and "AAAGH" In my powerpoint presentations.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 13, 2004's comic on:


Tags #daughter sneezed, #work from home, #answer boss phone, #phone messages aren't real, #bitung humor

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol: "My daughter sneezed so the school is sending her home." "I'll work from home for the rest of the day." The Boss: "How will you answer my phone?" Carol: "I probably shouldn't tell you this, but none of your phone messages are real."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 07, 1999's comic on:


Tags #morale, #family picture, #picture of you, #hard to look at, #freaks, #alice

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice, to the Boss, who is sitting at his desk, "...So our morale is... umm..." Alice asks, "What's that on your desk?" The Boss says, "It's a family picture." Alice picks up the photograph, "I might be wrong but I think it's only a picture of you." The Boss says, "The rest of the family is hard to look at." The Boss continues, "I see no reason I should suffer." Alice is stunned. The Boss asks, "Now what was your question about morale?" Alice walks out of the Boss' office. He calls to her, "Alice?" The Boss picks up the picture of himself and says, directly to it, "We're surrounded by freaks."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 25, 2005's comic on:


Tags #20 % staff, #failing perfromance, #required, #muscles, #money hurlage, #metting, #denounce employees, #criticize

View Transcript

Transcript

"The company requires me to give failing performance reviews to 20% of my staff." "There are four of you, so that works out to...80% of a person." "Wally, your calf muscles and ankles are performing well, but the rest of you is monkey hurlage."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 21, 2005's comic on:


Tags #charging time, #projects, #no work, #wind, #existence of your wind, #farting around

View Transcript

Transcript

"Wally, you've been charging your time to several projects, but no one has ever seen you work." "You can't see the wind, either, but surely you don't doubt that it exists." "I've also gotten complaints about the existence of your wind." "I rest my case."