Hat Makes Taller Comic Strips - Page 8
421 Results for Hat Makes Taller
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Share October 20, 1990's comic on:
The defense lawyer says, "Okay, let's say that, hypothetically, my client did kill those people . . ." His client is holding an ax and wearing an executioner's hat. The attorney says to Dilbert and the other members of the jury, "Chances are that it was nobody you know." The lawyer continues, "And the next time you're standing in a long line, ask yourself: 'Am I better off now that there are less people?'"
Share December 20, 1990's comic on:
Dogbert writes, "Dear Senator, I demand a constitutional amendment banning the obscene and anti-American lyrics in opera." Dilbert asks, "What makes you think a senator will care about an issue like that?" An aide says to a senator, "I think we found another issue to keep us from working on real problems." The senator reaches for the letter and says, "Ooh-ooh!"
Share December 21, 1990's comic on:
Senator Newt Axxes' Office. Senator Axxe: Mister Dogbert makes a strong argument for banning opera. Man: The polls show that almost nobody cares about this issue... There's virtually no political risk in embracing it! Senator Axxe: Until they scrape your festering corpse out of that chair!
Share March 04, 1991's comic on:
Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I've decided to open a vocational training school." Dilbert asks, "For whom?" Dogbert replies, "Self-service gas station attendants." Dilbert asks, "You mean, students will pay you to teach them how to sit and do nothing?" Dogbert replies, "It makes you wonder why nobody is already doing it."
Share March 22, 1991's comic on:
Dogbert thinks, "I'm in a bad mood. I'll have to annoy Dilbert and see if it makes me feel better." Dilbert sits at his desk. Dogbert stands behind him and says, "I just noticed that your ears don't match from the back." Dilbert gasps and grabs his ears. Dogbert walks away thinking, "Ahh . . ."
Share May 30, 1991's comic on:
Dilbert stands at the counter in a retail store. The salesclerk says, "This Sony Sniffman makes a nice gift." The clerk continues, "You can play the smells of your favorite stars!" The salesperson hands Dilbert the Sniffman and says, "Try it - it's Donny Osmond's gym bag." Dilbert asks, "Is it 'new Donny' or classic?"
Share June 14, 1991's comic on:
The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and a woman, "I'm discontinuing the employee drug testing program . . ." The Boss shows Dilbert a document and says, "Because my own tests keep turning out positive . . . Which makes me suspect that some wise guy has tampered with the medical computer." Dilbert says, "Denial and paranoia . . . Classic symptoms." Wally asks, "Is he 'high' right now?"
Share July 23, 1991's comic on:
Dogbert and Dilbert sit at a table. Dogbert asks, "What makes you think you can win the stand-up comedy competition?" Dilbert replies, "It's just a matter of writing good jokes." Dilbert says, "Here's one - - 'Why do women go to the restroom in pairs?'" Dogbert asks, "Why?" Dilbert says, "Because they're stapled to the chicken! Hee-hee!" Dogbert says, "It's been nice knowing you."
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Share July 14, 2012's comic on:
Bank Teller: Thanks for the deposit, sucker! We plan to waste it on complicated hedging strategies that we don't even understand. Dilbert: Your honesty is refreshing. Bank Teller: Thanks, but it makes cross-selling harder.