Health Insurance Comic Strips - Page 8

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

224 Results for Health Insurance

View 71 - 80 results for health insurance comic strips. Discover the best "Health Insurance" comics from Dilbert.com.

Work Until You Drop

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Work Until You Drop - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags health, monitor, fitbit, energy, surveillance, wearable tech, dedication, work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Your health tracker says you are leaving work at the end of each day with energy to spare. That's exactly like stealing from the company. Dilbert: You want me to work until I drop? Boss: I'm not allowed to say that directly.

Wally Is A Maverick

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Is A Maverick - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags health, standing desks, standing, sitting, laziness

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: I like to think of myself as a maverick. Let the trendy people brag about their standing desks. I haven't stood in a week. Dilbert: I have some bad news about your health risks. Wally: Should I sit down to hear it?

Ted Might Drop Dead

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ted Might Drop Dead - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags health, monitor, fitbit, wearable tech, heart attack, diseases, death, prediction, medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Ted, your performance is poor. I need to let you go. Ted: Is it a coincidence that you're firing me at the same time my employee health monitor detected cardiovascular disease? How good are the predictive analytics on this? Boss: Don't make lunch plans.

Let's Do The Meeting Later

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Let's Do The Meeting Later - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags fitbit, health, monitor, wearable tech, surveillance

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: According to your employee health monitor, your lack of sleep last night is hampering your mental functions. Let's end the meeting and try again when your brain is working better. Man: I don't understand. Dilbert: That is consistent with the data.

Boss Is Sane

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Is Sane - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mental health, mental illness, managers, sane, insanity, logic

View Transcript

Transcript

Narrator: Dogbert The Mental Health Expert. Boss: Can you confirm that my employees have lost their minds? Dogbert: Yes, because they work for you. Any other questions? Boss: But I'm sane, right? Dogbert: Yes, because you hired me.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags insurance, humiliation, death, scam, darwin awards, spin, headline, media, Entertainment, medical

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Would you like to buy an insurance policy to protect against a humorous death? Boss: Why would I need it? Dogbert: well, let's say you're at the zoo and you drop your sunglasses into the lion pit. You lower yourself into the pit to get the sunglasses, but the lions get to you first. You don't want the headlines to read "Pointy-haired Idiot Mauled To Death By The King Of The Jungle." So instead, the moment you die, my agents rush in to create a narrative for the media. In this case, we might spin the story as "Local Man Teaches Zoo How To Reduce Food Costs." Boss: Are the policies affordable? Dogbert: Yes, if you waive the coverage for mascot-related deaths.

Cake Is Healthy

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Cake Is Healthy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags cake, diet, employees, employment, health, health food, office, office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: We're launching a health and wellness initiative for employees this week. In other news, we have cake in the break room to celebrate all of the birthdays this month. Dilbert: Because cake is healthy? Boss: Learn to compartmentalize.

Casserole For Pot Luck

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Casserole For Pot Luck  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Food, health & safety, office, office workers, casserole, potluck, inspection, home, kitchen

View Transcript

Transcript

tina: i brought a casserole for the potluck. when are you coming? dilbert: when was the last time the health department did an inspection of your home kitchen? tina: never dilbert: that's when i'll be going to the potluck.

Version 2 Kills

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Version 2 Kills - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags business, upgrade, software, technology, version, health, issue, nonsense

View Transcript

Transcript

wally with face mask giving presentation: according to our newest data, 100% of the people who upgraded to version 2.0 of our software died the same day. wally to boss: but we don't think it means anything because all of them had underlying health issues. boss: how did they all have underlying health issues? wally: version 1.0 had some rough edges too.

Talking To Wally

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Talking To Wally - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mental health, office workers, health, alone time, listen, crazy, hate, talking, fake, empathy, business, coffee

View Transcript

Transcript

dilbert: dogbert doesn't believe me when i tell him i need more alone time for my mental health. wally: why would he listen to you when you're obviously crazy? dilbert: i hate talking to you. wally: should i fake more empathy.