Leadership Vsion Comic Strips - Page 8
Search Filters
Year
- 2021
- 2020
- 2019
- 2018
- 2017
- 2016
- 2015
- 2014
- 2013
- 2012
- 2011
- 2010
- 2009
- 2008
- 2007
- 2006
- 2005
- 2004
- 2003
- 2002
- 2001
- 2000
- 1999
- 1998
- 1997
- 1996
- 1995
- 1994
- 1993
- 1992
- 1991
- 1990
- 1989
Character
137 Results for Leadership Vsion
View 71 - 80 results for leadership vsion comic strips. Discover the best "Leadership Vsion" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday August 19,
2016
Boss Freestyles With Jargon
Tags #language, #jargon, #managers, #leadership, #nonsense, #gibberish
Transcript
Boss: I forgot to make an agenda for this meeting, so I'll just freestyle it with jargon. Let's do a deep dive in the big data and drill down until we hyperlocalize some disruptive technologies. That's enough leadership. Now the rest of you need something to do.
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Thursday December 29,
2016
Oxygen Not In The Budget
Tags #space flight, #astronaut, #oxygen, #breathing, #leadership, #obliviousness
Transcript
Boss: I'm happy to announce that we launched our company's spaceship to Mars. We only had enough in the budget to give them oxygen for three-quarters of the trip. So I told them to breathe smarter, not harder. It's called leadership.
Friday March 24,
2017
Wally Gets Promoted
Tags #managers, #management, #leadership, #laziness, #work ethic
Transcript
Wally: I got promoted to a leadership role. It means I get to tell people to work hard, but I don't have to do any worm myself. Dilbert: That doesn't sound right. Wally: I could use a fresh one of these.
Sunday July 30,
2017
Tags #boss, #leadership, #power, #influence
Transcript
Boss: Why isn't your project done? Dilbert: I can't make the people on my team do any work because I'm not their boss. Boss: Sure you can. It's called leadership. I do it all the time. Dilbert: All you do is threaten to fire people. I can't do that because I"m not their boss. Boss: That's why you have to use your soft leadership skills A good leader can get people to do anything. Dilbert: Then why couldn't you get me to finish my project on time? And why do you pay me? You could just lead me to work for free. Boss: Shut up or I'll fire you.
Thursday August 31,
2017
View From Thirty Thousand Feet
Tags #distance, #jargon, #managers, #leadership, #buzzwords, #guidance
Transcript
Boss: What's the view on this from thirty thousand feet? Alice: From that distance, everything we do is meaningless. Boss: Then how do we know what to do? Alice: I guess we ruled out "leadership."
Saturday February 10,
2018
Need To Be More Creative
Tags #manager, #managing, #creativity, #company culture, #control, #leadership
Transcript
Boss: We need to be more creative. Also, don't do anything except what I tell you to do or else I'll fire you. Dilbert: Thank you for your leadership. Boss: We also need to communicate less.
Thursday August 30,
2018
Unmotivated Staff
Tags #Catbert, #the boss, #wrong, #leadership, #skills
Transcript
The Boss: A few months ago, I realized my staff was unmotivated and working on all the wrong things. It took all of my leadership skills to get them motivated again. Catbert: Are they still doing the wrong things? The Boss: Faster than ever.
Tuesday June 11,
2019
Leadership And Guessing
Tags #business, #coffee, #managers & supervisors, #office
Transcript
alice to the boss: one option is to use the old method that has never once worked, but we think we know how to make it work next time. alice: the other option is to try something new that we can't be sure will work. alice: it's almost as if leadership is nothing but guessing. the boss drinking coffee: let's change the subject.
Friday July 05,
2019
Leaders Have Differen Memories
Tags #business, #meeting, #office, #stupid, #leadership
Transcript
the boss: we had a leadership meeting to decide how to move forward. the boss: but all the leaders left the meeting with wildly different ideas about what we agreed on. carol: how do you leaders plan to solve that? the boss: phase one involves accusing each other of being stupid.
Monday August 12,
2019
Leadership Conference In Maui
Tags #boss, #irritation, #managers & supervisors, #vacations
Transcript
Boss: The leadership conference is in Maui next week. I need you to sit in for me...and do your own job at the same time. While I'm drinking on the beach. Dilbert: I get it!!!