Lose A Bet Comic Strips - Page 8
147 Results for Lose A Bet
View 71 - 80 results for lose a bet comic strips. Discover the best "Lose A Bet" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share December 19, 1993's comic on:
Dilbert kneels in front of a machine. He tells Dogbert, "My time machine is complete." Dogbert says, "I guess you'll be off to explore exotic and fascinating civilizations." Dilbert asks, "Why would anybody want to do that?" Dogbert replies, "Beats me." Dilbert says, "My plan is to send all of our trash to ourselves twenty years from now. We'll have much better recycling methods by then." Dilbert puts a bag of trash into the time machine and says, "I wonder what elegant methods we'll have for recycling in the future." Dilbert continues, "I bet we'll have a way that's quick and efficient and . . ." Dogbert asks, "Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Dilbert says, "Uh-oh." They hear a "ping." Dilbert and Dogbert stand among several bags of trash. Dilbert says, "We would send it back in time and wait for it to decompose." Dogbert says, "I hate us."
Share November 13, 1994's comic on:
The Boss stands in front of Alice, Dilbert and Al. He says, "I need to promote one of you to the district manager position." Dilbert, Al and Alice look at the Boss. The Boss says, "Dilbert, your technical knowledge is too valuable to lose." The Boss continues, "Ditto for Alice. Neither of you can be promoted." Dilbert and Alice look angry. The Boss says, "The only logical choice is to promote Al because he has no valuable knowledge." Dilbert replies, "Al??! A director??! He doesn't know what day of the week it is!! The Boss tells Al, "They're just grumpy because it's Monday." Dilbert says, "It's Thursday."
Share November 27, 1994's comic on:
The Boss tells Dilbert, "I'm moving you to a cubicle in the south wing." Dilbert asks, "Why?" The Boss answers, "Umm . . . It's more efficient if my group is all in one place." Dilbert replies, "Not for me. The people on my project team are all in this wing." The Boss says, "It will improve communication in our group." Dilbert replies, "I don't need to communicate with my group. I only need to work with my project team." Dilbert continues, "I'll bet another manager wants that same cubicle in the south wing. I think I'm just a pawn in your little game." The Boss says, "You move tomorrow. By the way, there's a new dress code." Dilbert and Wally wear chess pawn costumes. Dilbert says, "You're in my cubicle." Wally replies, "You can only move to a diagonal cubicle."
Share September 24, 1995's comic on:
Dilbert says, "I have to take a contract to our company lawyer. I need your help, Dogbert." Dilbert and Dogbert sit in front of a lawyer's desk. Dilbert says, "Please review this contract. I need it today." The attorney replies, "Give me all of your copies plus the original then go away." Dogbert screams, "Don't do it! He plans to lose them!!" Dilbert says, "Good dog!" The lawyer says, "Dang!" The lawyer looks at the contract and says, "I can't approve this. Somebody might sue us for no good reason." Dilbert says to Dogbert, "That's true with any contract. Isn't he using absurd logic?" Dogbert replies, "Let's find out." Dogbert stands on his chair and shouts, "Approve the contract now or I'll sue you for obstruction of dogs!!" The lawyer says, "Okay okay." Dilbert says, "Wow." Dogbert says, "The great thing about absurd logic is that it fits any situation."
Share September 14, 1997's comic on:
The Boss holds a letter and says, "Carol, how do I address an envelope?" Carol, his secretary, sings, "I'll do it." Carol explains to Dilbert, "I'm training him to be helpless." She says, "It's part of my master plan to eliminate him." Carol says, "I do everything for him. Soon he'll lose his ability to solve small problems alone." She says, "Then I'll 'accidentally' book him on a one-way trip to South Korea." Carol says, "Before he goes, I'll tell him they have a death penelty for speaking English." Carol laughs a maniacal laugh and says, "We'll never see him again. Buwahaha!" Dilbert walks off and says, "It's worth a shot." The Boss calls from his office and says, "Carol, how do I dial for an outside line?" Carol says, "I'll do it."
Share May 28, 1999's comic on:
Dilbert comes home from work still wearing his robe.. Dilbert says, to dogbert, "You said you'd give me a million bucks if I went to work like this. Pay up." Dogbert says, "I'll bet you double or nothing that you won't go to work totally naked." Dilbert sits naked in his cubicle and thinks, "Wait... what were his exact words?"
Share August 23, 1998's comic on:
The Boss stands in front of a cake and says, "Happy combined birthdays." The Boss continues, "Today we honor the employees who had birthdays within the past year." Wally, Dilbert and Alice stand as the Boss continues, "That's Dilbert...Alice...Asok...did I miss anyone?" Wally raises his hand and says, "Umm...you missed me." The Boss says, "You too? That's spooky." The Boss continues, "I'd cut the cake, but it's a plastic prop." The Boss says, "Let's sing. Does anyone know the words to 'Happy Birthday'?" The Boss walks down the hallway with the fake cake under his arm, and thinks, "I bet those weren't even the real words."
Share January 10, 2001's comic on:
THE MOTIVATION FAIRY: The Motivation Fairy, hovering in the air behind Wally, says "You will be my greatest challenge." Wally turns to the Motivation Fairy and says, "I'll bet you get paid less than minimum wage and they don't reimburse you for travel." The Fairy drops the magic wand and says, "Wings... So... Heavy..." Wally asks, "So, what kind of career path you got going?"
Share May 23, 2001's comic on:
Alice and a businessman sit at a bar. Alice says, "This is strictly business, right? We're going to talk about your company's product." The businessman raises his glass to Alice and says, "I bet I can drink for chardonnay than you can." Later, Alice's hair is completely dishevelled and both Alice and the businessman are slumped in their chairs, totally drunk. Alice says, "You're a hanshum man and so ish your twin bruver." The business man burps loudly.
Share May 24, 2001's comic on:
Alice approaches Noriko who is sitting at her desk. Alice asks, "I'm dating an unattractive man. What should I do?" Noriko replies, "Every man is ugly until a woman fixes him up. Think of it as a project." Alice stands with a clipboard in hand as she lists her unattractive man's faults, who sits before her, obviously balding. She says, "Next, lose the combover, or at least stay out of the wind." The man asks, "How did you know about the combover?"