Make Ship Date Comic Strips - Page 8

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1000 Results for Make Ship Date

View 71 - 80 results for make ship date comic strips. Discover the best "Make Ship Date" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 06, 1996's comic on:


Tags #date other men, #break up, #need a spare, #not break up, #other dates

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Liz and Dilbert walk outdoors. Liz says, "I've decided to date other men." Dilbert cries, "Nooo!!! Don't break up with me!" Liz replies, "I'm not. I just want to date other men at the same time." Dilbert folds his arms across his chest and says, "I am NOT happy right now." Liz points to a man walking next to her and says, "That's exactly why I need a spare."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 07, 1997's comic on:


Tags #mail order bride, #elbonian, #exact date, #garage

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Wally and Dilbert sit at a table eating lunch. Wally says, "My Elbonian mail-order bride will arrive any day now." Dilbert asks, "Why don't you know the exact date?" Wally replies, "Because they're sending her by mail. I wasn't willing to pay for overnight delivery." Dilbert says, "She's one lucky gal." Wally says, "I'll probably keep her in the garage. It has a sink."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 20, 1997's comic on:


Tags #bad news, #perfromance review, #bell curve, #make up flaws, #does not wash hands, #after restroom

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The Boss tells Wally, "Bad news on your performance review, Wally." The Boss continues, "Everyone performed the same. But I'm required to rank the group on a bell curve." The Boss continues, "I had to make up some flaws to move you down the curve. Here's a pen. Sign it." Wally reads the review, "Employee does not wash hands after using the restroom."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 10, 1997's comic on:


Tags #incredibly sexy, #fuzzy guy, #dogebrt, #dillbert, #in touch with feelings, #make me doubt, #scientific methid

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Dogbert stands with the cute girl. Dilbert wears a jogging suit. The girls says, "Wow. you're an incredibly sexy man. It's too bad I met this little fuzzy guy first." The girls says, "But looks aren't everything. Studies show that women want a man who is in touch with his feelings." Dilbert raises his eye brows. Dilbert screams, "I hate my life!!" The girls says, "Gee. That's enough to make me doubt the scientific method."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 06, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Men, #communicate, #only talks, #Sports, #computers, #job, #tv, #sex, #jokes, #greek mythology, #date, #likes, #dislikes, #business

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Dilbert is on a date. His date says, "I like men who know how to communicate..." The date says, "But not a man you only talks about sports, or computers, or his job, or tv, or sex, or jokes, or his accomplishments..." Dilbert says, "That would leave... Greek mythology... and you." The date says, "No Greek stuff."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 14, 1997's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #hugger, #first date, #watch snagged, #bra strap

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Dilbert meets his date. His date puts out her arms and says, "Hi, Dilbert! Hi, Dogbert!" Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh!" Dilbert's date goes in for a hug. Dilbert thinks, "She's a hugger on the first date. I never know where my arms should go." Dilbert hugs his date, his arms going down her shirt and lifting it up to her head. You can see her bra and Dilbert says, "I hope this doesn't seem awkward, but my watch is snagged on your bra strap."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 15, 1997's comic on:


Tags #hugged your date, #snagged in blouse, #hilarious, #free your arm, #ripped top off, #engineer, #diamond cutter, #engineering

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Dilbert is at home after his date. Dogbert says, "I loved it when you hugged your date and your arm got snagged on her blouse." Dilbert looks angry. Dogbert waves his arms in the air and says, "And it was hilarious when you tried to free your arm and accidently ripped her top off." Dogbert says, "But the best part was when you yelled, 'I'm an engineer, not a diamond cutter, dang it!'" Dilbert says, "Shut up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 09, 1997's comic on:


Tags #coached well, #date, #date analyzer, #cubicle fibers, #office job

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Dilbert arrives for his date. A woman opens the door and Dilbert says, "Grunt, grunt. Absolutely right. Grunt, grunt, grunt." Dilbert says, "Grunt, grunt, grunt." She says, 'Someone coached you well for this date. You haven't said a thing I object to yet." Dilbert is strapped to a huge microscope labled, "Date-alyzer." He says, "Grunt." She stands at the control panel and says, "I see cubicle fibers... you have an office job."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 21, 1998's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil hr diretor, #personal lives, #strict dress code, #homes, #one less decision, #make every day

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At the staff meeting, Catbert says to Dilbert and Wally, "your personal lives reflect on this company." Catbert continues, "From now on, a strict dress code will be enforced in your homes." At home Dilbert says to Dogbert, "On the plus side, it's one less decision I have to make every day." He's wearing a coon skin cap, suspenders, a tu-tu and knee-high boots.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 02, 1998's comic on:


Tags #help on assignment, #no brainer, #interface design, #make beige, #decisions, #can't go wrong

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Dilbert is in The Boss's office. He holds some files and says, "I need help on the assignment that you said is a 'no brainer.'" The Boss says, "It's easy. Just skip the 'interface design' phase and make everything beige. You can't go wrong with beige." Dilbert walks away thinking, "I always know where to go for no-brainer decisions."