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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 18, 1990's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #foreign, #language, #children, #dress, #vikings, #hollering

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Dogbert says to Dilbert, "Opera should be banned from television." Dogbert continues, "It must be obscene, or they wouldn't have to sing it in a foreign language." Dogbert continues, "And we can't let children think it's okay to dress like Vikings and go around hollering."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 07, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #judy, #dog, #blind, #dates, #fetching, #flowers, #woman

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Dilbert holds a bouquet of flowers as he rings a doorbell and thinks, "I'm always nervous on blind dates." A dog in a dress answers the door and says, "Hi, I'm Judy! You must be Dilbert." Dilbert says, "Hi . . ." Judy asks, "How do I look?" Dilbert replies, "Um . . . fetching."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 19, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #authentic, #chunk, #berlin, #wall

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Dogbert stands in front of a exhibit and says to the man and woman behind him, "This authentic chunk of the Berlin wall is the latest acquisition of my museum." The woman says, "Hey! You must think we're a couple of hillbillies. We saw a hole in your sidewalk in that exact shape." Dogbert says, "Obviously we had to trade a chunk of our sidewalk to Berlin so we could get this." The man says to the woman, "Apologize to the dog, Flossie."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 24, 1991's comic on:


Tags #scientist, #dispel, #society, #notion, #male, #Women, #gender, #gender roles, #aerobic, #instructor

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Dilbert and several men sit in the audience. A man says, "At the 'Scientist Anti-Defamation League' we must dispel society's notion that scientists are always male." The speaker continues, "Unfortunately, our membership is totally male because all of you joined just to meet women. Any ideas?" One man says, "Maybe we could merge with the 'Aerobic Instructor Anti-Defamation League.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 06, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #sheep, #punishment, #sheepless, #nights, #herding, #Dogbert, #sheep jokes

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The caption says, "Sheep Jokes." Dilbert and Dogbert walk through a meadow holding staffs and herding sheep. A sheep says, "Mom, he's herding me! He must think I'm a mutton for punishment! If we run away, he'll have some sheepless nights."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 26, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #anti-gravity, #company, #sagging, #skin, #gravity, #formula, #proud

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, "I sold my anti-gravity patent to a company who wants to bring the benefits to the world." A television commercial shows an old woman with sagging breasts in the "before" picture and the same woman with upturned breasts in the "after" picture. The announcer asks, "Tired of sagging skin?" The announcer continues, "Get the patented 'Dilbert Anti-Gravity Beauty Formula!'" Dogbert watches the tv advertisement and says, "You must be so proud."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 08, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #chool, #self-service, #gas, #station, #attendants, #thoughts, #minds, #easy

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The caption says, "Second day: Dogbert's School for Self-Service Gas Station Attendants." Dogbert says, "You must learn to relax . . ." Dogbert continues, "I want you to clear your minds of all thoughts." The three students sit limply in their chairs with blank looks on their faces. Dogbert thinks, "That was too easy."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 18, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #bob, #dinosaur, #exhausted, #need, #answer, #think

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Dilbert sits at the table and says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Sometimes I wonder how a dinosaur like you can survive, Bob." Dilbert continues, "I mean, your brain is so tiny . . . You must get exhausted just trying to think. How do you do it?" Bob clenches his teeth and says, "Think think think." Dilbert says, "Uh . . . that's okay. I don't really need an answer to that question."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 29, 1991's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #pink, #slip, #color, #bad, #today, #rob

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "My boss gave me the pink slip today." Dogbert says, "You must feel pretty bad." Dilbert walks away wearing a woman's slip. He says, "Yeah . . . Pink isn't my color."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 25, 1991's comic on:


Tags #discovered, #field, #landing, #strips, #alien, #crop, #circles, #Dilbert, #armchair, #television

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Alien: They have discovered our wheat field landing strips... We must scare them away. ...and don't go snooping around stonehenge either.