Normal Is Boring Comic Strips - Page 8

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137 Results for Normal Is Boring

View 71 - 80 results for normal is boring comic strips. Discover the best "Normal Is Boring" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #judicial proceedings, #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #evidence, #jury, #deliberation, #system, #coin

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The caption says, "Jury deliberation." Dilbert, Dogbert and the other members of the jury sit at a conference table. Dogbert says, "I'll be the jury foreman, since the rest of you are losers." Dogbert asks, "Did anybody listen to the boring parts with the evidence?" Dogbert says, "And nobody as a coin?! Geez, what's this system coming to??"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #school, #technology, #imbeciles, #baffled, #intelligence, #generalizing

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Dogbert says to a group of people, "Welcome to Dogbert's School for Technology Imbeciles." Dogbert continues, "You are all easily baffled by simple technology, even though you have normal intelligence otherwise." Dogbert continues, "Of course, I'm generalizing on that last point."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lottery tickets, #sale, #value, #yesterdays lottery, #half priced lottery, #cheat, #scam, #Dogbert, #salesman, #scammer, #office dog, #customer

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"What makes these a 'value'?" "Value priced lottery tickets" "They're half the normal price, and yet the chance of winning is only one in ten million less." "Hey! This is for yesterday's lottery!" "And your point is...?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #donate blood, #good for society, #too comepetetive, #thirsty

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Wally and a man stand in line at the blood drive. The man says, "I don't mind donating blood . . . It's good for society . . ." The man continues, "But I'm worried that our company is getting too competitive about how much we give compared to other companies." Dilbert leaves the blood drive saying, "Man, I'm thirsty!!" His head and body have shrunk to half their normal size.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #arm, #asleep, #arm chair, #Dogbert, #tongue, #body

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Dilbert lies on the couch. He thinks, "Uh-oh . . . My foot is asleep." Dilbert thinks, "I'd better hop around . . . Oh no, my arm is asleep too." Dilbert thinks, "Ouch, ouch!! I'll have to hop and wave my arm." Dogbert watches Dilbert hopping and waving his arms. Dilbert speaks to Dogbert and his words are slurred. He thinks, "My tongue is asleep." Dilbert runs into the chair. Dilbert lies face down on the chair. He says, "Aaahhh . . . It's okay now, Dogbert. Everything is back to normal." Dilbert adds, "Except my nose is asleep and I feel a sneeze coming on."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #friend, #service, #questions, #accidentally, #borrowed, #tool, #lethal, #trap, #qualified, #sea monkeys

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The sign over Dogbert's desk reads, "Dogbert's Find-A-Friend Service." A man says, "I'd like to find a friend." Dogbert says, "Have a seat." Dogbert says, "I need to ask a few questions, so I don't accidentally match you with somebody who's too good for you." Dogbert says, "One: When a friend doesn't return a borrowed tool, do you? a: Make sarcastic comments; b: buy a new tool; c: set a lethal trap." The man answers, "C: Set a lethal trap." Later, Dogbert reads the results of the test and says, "I'm afraid you haven't qualified for a normal friend . . . I could set you up with somebody who's new in town, but it wouldn't last." Dogbert says, "There's one option . . . Two, if you count growing sea monkeys." The man stands at Dilbert's door. Dilbert says, "Yes, I hate sea monkeys too. Who are you?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #alice slams wally, #fast forwarded, #harrasment, #ignore sexy, #mandatory video, #sext, #sexual harassment, #video, #evolution

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Wally says to Alice, "I just watched the mandatory video on sexual harassment. It worked!" Wally continues, "In only thirty minutes, that video corrected a billion years of evolution. Do something sexy and watch me ignore it!" After Alice shoves Wally's head into the wall, he says, "I probably shouldn't have fast-forwarded through the boring parts."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anti rust, #bald, #big field, #butterfly turned opera singer, #car dealer, #data compression, #dream analysts, #extended warranty, #new algorythm, #running against wind, #sealant, #serious money

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Someone reaches for a door labeled "Dogbert's Dream Analysis." Dogbert and a man sit at a conference table. The man says, "I was in a big field full of tofu and carburetors." Dogbert says, "It means you're a gullible moron. That's $25 please." A woman tells Dogbert, "Then I was running, running, running against the wind." Dogbert replies, "That means you're ugly." Wally tells Dogbert, "Then the butterfly turned into an opera singer." Dogbert says, "That means you're bald." Dilbert tells Dogbert, "Suddenly I saw a new algorythm for data compression." Dogbert replies, "It means you're boring." The Boss tells Dogbert, "Then I told the car dealer I wanted the anti-rust sealant, the extended warranty and the lease option." The Boss asks, "What do you think it means?" Dogbert replies, "It means I'm going to make some serious money today."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #idiotic promise, #brain, #amazing thing, #untapped power, #solution, #enjoy walk

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Dilbert and Dogbert walk outdoors. Dilbert says, ". . . So the salesperson made an idiotic promise to our customer. Now it's MY job to fix it." Dogbert says, "The brain is an amazing thing." Dilbert asks, "Are you saying that if I use the untapped power of my brain, there's a solution?" Dogbert replies, "No, I'm saying my amazing brain filtered out your boring story so I could enjoy my walk."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #administrative task, #beg for asisiatnace, #network administrator, #new password, #upgrading network, #forgotten password

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Asok says to Dogbert, "I have forgotten my password. I humbly beg for assistance." Dogbert replies angrily, "I have no time for boring administrative tasks, you fool! I'm busy upgrading the network!" Asok says, "You could have give me a new password in the time it took to belittle me." Dogbert replies, "Yes, but which option would give me job satisfaction?"